Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology

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Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology
Motto Hang Loose
Established 1874
School type Private
Head Dr. J
Location Terre Haute, IN., U.S.
Campus Urban,
Endowment 8"
Faculty ln(2)
Mascot Surfers
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Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology is a laid back, easy going school located in the world's most beautiful city: Terre Haute, Indiana. Well known for its sunny beaches and daring ski slopes, Rose-Hulman has become the center for both skiing and surfing in the Northern Hemisphere. For this reason, Rose-Hulman attracts a number of good looking people (mostly ladies) who come for the party like atmosphere that dominates the campus.


Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology was founded in 1874 as the Terre Haute Surfing School of Skiing. After its founder's death from an unfortunate shark-jumping incident, the board (that is, the board that the founder was riding on at the time) quickly changed the school's name to honor the school's founder, Chauncey Institute. Thus, the school became known as the Rose Polytechnic Institute (the Rose was added because it sounded pretty... and most likely, the board was high at the time). Due to the rising ocean levels (a result of early 20th century global warming), in 1917 the campus was forced to move 10 miles away from its original location in order to maintain its position along the prime surfing grounds of Terre Haute. The next big change would come in 1971 when the school would be renamed once more following its merger with the Hulman Disco Company. The new name, Rose-Hulman Institute of Disco, was quickly changed to Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology after people realized just how ridiculous they looked doing disco.

The school's history after 1971 was dominated by President Sir Sam Hulbert, leader of the known world, ruler of all that is good, conqueror of the elves, and inventor of the pet rock. During his reign, great statues of him lined the campus. Bikini-clad babes would stroll alongside him while questionably-homosexual men bowed at his feet. A mere touch from him could cure all illness while being in close proximity (say, 5 ft or so) would be good enough to cure the common cold. During his reign, Rose-Hulman found unmeasurable success, winning award after award. Not only did it host both the NCAA Skiing National Championship and the NCAA Surfing National Championship a record 25 times each (winning 26 times each, including two double-wins in '84), but it also hosted the G8 summit and the World Pancake Eating Contest. Rose-Hulman's bid for the 1992 Olympics fell short after suspected bribery from Barcelona allowed them to win the tie-breaking vote.

After his retirement to assume command of the entire universe, the school hired an unknown man from an unknown town. He did nothing.

Then they hired Dr. J. Which brings us to today.