- This entry is not to be confused with Romania.
Rumania has been looked down upon in the past because of some questionable pastimes. One of the most controversial was snorting kool-aid powder for days on end.
(what you are about to read, is not to be confused with ROMANIA, european country) Rumania had no geography. There was only one mountain, 5 meters tall, which Rumanian people used to call "the Hill", due to unknown reasons (most probably, antidisistablishmentaryinism). During week-ends, young adventurers used to climb "the Hill" until 1998, when a 16-years old nun died of alcoholism during such a trip. Since then, the Rumanian governement began demolishing "the Hill" using a strong combination of nachos and tacos. There weren't any bordering countries; due to its wise policies, Rumania neighbired itself. Natural resources were scarce and mostly located in some other remote countries.
Rumanians were a mystery to scientists. They had furry, smelly and delicate feet. It seemed that for a long time, they used to serve Sauron, nowadays known also as "Lord of the Dance"(that is, before he tried to steal their nachos and tacos; the bloody war that resulted is known as "The War of the Ring"). The major religion amongst Rumanians was orthodoxism, an ancient form of worshiping, half way between Islam and Christianity. The paradox was that, even though they were fervant believers, Rumanians consider that were not the Lord's (whoever might him be) creation, but the spawn of "Decebal" (leader of the Dacia factory) and "Trajan" (the first immigrant to became the emperor of Rome). This is, basically, all we knew about Rumanian people.
Rumania had no economy. Their major export was Ramen noodles, a food most commonly eaten by computer nerds and poor people. The people enjoyed spending all of their money on women, beer, Sony-Ericsson P800 and Motorola V220. The only treasure of Rumanian people was the "Closca cu puii mei de aur" (as in: "Hen with my golden offspring")... but the Russians locked her in their basement. The Rumanian people listened to a weird series of noises which they called "manele". Most of the people did not understand these sounds but Rumanian people enjoyed it very much, and probably a reason to this was nachos and tachos.
In 1756, a bloodless revolution, which ended in some 1,000,000 mutilations, 267.000 infections and a quarter of a million occurrences of malaria - but no deaths - brought to power an anarchist government . This authoritarian regime ruled Rumania until 2017, mainly because of its dictatorial use of nachos and tacos. As Oscar Wilde once said: "Nachos and tacos are the main causes of oppression in Rumania". Wise words, indeed...
A long, long time ago, in the past few years, a great leader was born. His name was "Harap Alb" (slang for White Arab). He died with a very rare form of illness. We do not know which type was it. He was also called The Great by his close friends, a bunch of tiny guys with some very deranged habits, such as eating all the birds, drinking all the rivers or freezing everything up while sneezing because of the cold they create by themselves.
One of the things Rumania was most famous for is its food, made from varying combinations of nachos and tacos.
Destination of the first fake pair of Nike shoes ever produced, a pair of "Air Max 94.5". The shoe went on to found the nation's first and only museum.