Sheeba the Destroyer

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Sheeba the Destroyer is an idol in the Midwest that acted as an abominable vacuum, that promptly consumed all of Los Angeles and Dennis Rodman.

A group of Sheeba worshipers. "Sheebas da shit."

Origination[edit]

Sheeba the Destroyer was created by the desperate act of a British expedition that had gotten lost in the jungles of India. The explorers captured a Native and ate it as a sacrifice to bring the wrath of Sheeba to the Earth. However, when Sheeba came down to the Earth she crushed the expedition with her large lips and then put them on crackers, which she secretly ate during French Class. As she roamed the jungles a witch doctor saw the great evil and lips she possesed and banished her to America.


Plight of Horror[edit]

In the most evil place in America(see; Kansas) Sheeba would divulge herself in terroizing small villages and towns. She would stand at peoples windows and simply stare at them with her mouth open until they ran to their bathrooms screaming. Traces of crackers were often found near windowsills and pillows. One man reported waking up in to see Sheeba laying next to him, staring at him with her mouth wide open. The man suffered from a minor stroke, when he woke up he was covered in cracker crumbs and naked.


Turned to Stone[edit]

Eventually, a ghost hunter was called to take down the idol by Moses. Moses prohphecised, "Show her a mirror, and she will freak out." Confucious also stated that "I bet she doesn't know where she is." On Octoboer 5th 2005 Sheeba the Destroyer was shown her own reflection by a hotel full of Japanese Tourists. According to one witness she imploded into a black hole and absorbed all of the hotel including the tourists and nearby dead babies. She then turned into a stone statue with her mouth frozen open for the rest of eternity.

Quotes[edit]

  • "It was like staring into the inside of a Tuba."- Oscar Wilde


Affiliated Religions[edit]