Shirley Manson

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Shirley Manson.
Shirley showing her talent

Cquote1.pngDid you mean: Toni Halliday Cquote2.png
Google on Shirley Manson

Shirley Delicious Hottest Thing Ever Manson is the goddess of indie rock aka the redhead who is the lead singer of that old dudes' band, Garbage. She was reavealed to the world to show that no Britney Spears can make so many people jackoff with no need to compose clingy songs or wear highschool uniforms.

Promissing future[edit]

Lil' Shyrl visiting adult websites

Lil' "Shyrl" was "made" at a strip-bar, where where Charles Manson and his boy/girlfriend Marilyn Manson were doing it, hidden into the bathroom. After that, the goth prince(ass) traveled desperatly to Scotchland, where she left his/her daughter with his/her manager.

Like all S.O.B. managers, he wanted to "invest on her carreer" introducing her to Hollywood. She always like messing around, just like his father. Since she was a kid she loved spending hours visiting harcore porn websites.

She was fucking smart, but extremely introverted. She was called nerd 'cause she used to carry her laptop everywhere. At school her nickname was Woody Woodpecker because she was redhead and skinny.

“I hated that time, I felt like crap! Who's Woody Woodpecker now?. At least I am full of money, bastards. The ones who mocked me, are now losers with their hands on their cocks, thinking about me while they jackoff. MWAHWAHWAHWAHWAHWA”

~ Shyrl on her childhood
"Shove it"

In the begginning of her career, she wanted to be an actress. She auditioned for the main part on The Crush, but she lost to Alicia Silverstone.

“I've never lost to that bitch. That part was to seduce an old guy, but I wasn't in the mood. The movie was pedophile, showing that the girls are the ones who wanna suck their cocks. I told the director to shove it and got out.”

~ confesses Shyrl

Things were not going very well. Then she decided to be a hostess. She competed with Christina Aguilera for a spot on The Mickey Mouse League, but she couldn't make it.

“That show was for dumbasses. That bitch only made it because her mom had anal sex with the owner of the TV Station. If it were my mom he wold have given me the entire show.”

~ Shyrl on The Mickey Mouse League



The hot tough girl started looking for bands interested in showing her pussy talent.She started as a backing vocal, until she beat the crap out of the possible candidates to the position of became the lead singer of a band called Angelfish.

“I wasn't born to be in the corner! I was born to catch the microfone in front of the band, wear micro-skirts, show my panties and make my fans go nuts.”

~ She declares

Such attitude rally impressed impressed an old dude who was looking for a nympho to be the lead singer of his band. After masturbating over some video on EmoTV, he wanted to know who was that readhead. He then watched the Mickey Mouse League and decided that she had to be in the band. Anyway, they couldn't do anything because Viagra hadn't been invented yet. Since then she is the lead singer of Garbage.

She started putting order in the house. She composed Version 2.0, reformullated the old song and spread to the media. The result? Imediate success! Manson mixed her masturbative performance on stage with electronic music, and then she (who are the old dudes?) became one of the most famous pop indie bands.

“Some lyrics are dark, I can't deny my dad's genes. But if some emo cries while listens to my mysic, I'm gonna start writing about suicide.”

~ She on dark lyrics and emos

See also[edit]