Sigur Rós

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Sigur Rós are a Icelandic pop band run by Vons Groceries, known for their upbeat songs about teen romance, and drama.


Ágætis Áblarghablurgh(1991)[edit]

when a group of Elf-slaves (Slalfes) from a fish factory were bought by an Entertainment-mogul, Kári Stefánsson, who intended to use his newly-formed "slalfe" polka band to entertain at children-parties and at funerals. This experiment went terribly wrong when the band "Kári's polka-slalfes & co" started their own subproject going by the name FreeUsElves (sigur-rós in Icelandic), writing songs in Elvish, Icelandic and Korean, protesting Elf slavery and high alcohol taxes.

The band is made up of 7 ex-slave-elves, named Gandálfur, Jónsi, Guttormur, and the rest of the band all have the name Trausti. (except for Bjarni, his name is Stefán) The newest album is called Takk... (onomatopeic term for thunder) and is their way to show the old slave-keepers the finger although they have none (Elves do not have fingers (exept for Bjarni)). The Elf slavery was soon abandoned after the word of this group spread around the world.

Today, Sigur-rós brings more cash in to the economy of Iceland than the Elf-slave-factories did before. People are flocking from all around the world to go Elf-hunting in the highlands of Iceland and with the hope of getting the BIGprice, shooting down a member of this trouble-making Elfband. Their polka tunes still are popular though in northern europe and rumour has it that an Italian teacher, Marenda Kúka shot down the band's drummer in june 2004, collecting more then 600 kilos of raw hot-dogs as a reward. This, however, has not been confirmed; as there never was any beat in this band, no-one can really tell if the drummer is dead or alive.

Sigur-rós's best known tracks are: Mary-Kate Ashley, Untitled #17, Untitled #15, Steel and a knife, and the most famous one, "Hey guys, can you give me a hand? I kind of have a nosebleed here. Oh God, I think I'm dying"

Ágætis Áblarghablurgh is Greenlandic, roughly translated as Spoons and Arrows.

Von (1992)[edit]

During this time Vons grocery was growing to be not just a Mom and Pop Grocers, and into a huge bad-ass operation. Seeing as it was based in Greenland, Sigur Ros began doing shows there, and Von bought them out. They were so overjoyed, they made an album about it.

(o) (1993)[edit]

The bands most popular album is (o) (often referred to by fans as "the gaping ass" album) which sold 23 million copies. The 37 songs on the albums are all untitled and the lyrics to each one is based upon a chapter from "The Diary of Anne Frank" (except the lyrics for Untitled 8 which lists American presidents in alphabetical order). Following the success of the album Sigur Ros made a guest appearance on Seinfeld where they performed the 17 minute long Untitled 21.

The Sound[edit]

Some describe the sound of Sigur Ros similar of that to a moan that only certain whales can achieve. This being one of the highest compliments a musical group can achieve, seeing as whales are the most supreme users of sound. Others might say that Sigur Ros possess the ability to control mermaid mating rituals around the globe due to their heavy influence on aquatic love tones.