Sulfuric acid

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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Sulfuric acid.
Often used to season the popular dish of fish and chips, sulfuric acid is enjoyed by children worldwide.

“Johnny was a chemist's son,
But Johnny is no more,
For what he thought was H2O,
Was H2SO4.”

In 1897, Sulfuric Acid, Suwphuwic Aphid to those readers with lisps, was discovered lying around the office by scientists on a boring Monday morning when they had nothing better to do.

Abandoned by its parents, Sulfuric Acid became known as a bit of a bad boy and has been known to dissolve several other important elements, including magnesium, erbium, oxygen and a top-secret element that some other scientists in a rival office had filed under "possible cures for cancer, maybe".

As a result, the P118, the committee set up by the 118 elements of the periodic table, has been vastly reduced in size, and renamed P17. The 17 remaining elements are as follows:

Let us never forget, however, that Sulfuric Acid is easily one of, if not the most important element currently utilized by major manufacturers. Indeed, without Sulfuric Acid, everyday items we take for granted would not exist. These range from items such as sponges, radios and elastic bands up to duvets and poodles.

Sulfuric Acid has been asked to join a team of super elements, known only as "The Team Of Super Elements", which currently consists of Water, Earth, Fire, Air and Biscuits.

See also[edit]