Great Cornholio

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~ The Great Cornholio on himself

“In Soviet Russia, teepee needs YOU!”

~ Russian Reversal on teepee

“I know that the human being and cornholians can coexist peacefully!”

~ George Bush on Cornholians

“Get me teepee for my bunghole!”

~ The Great Cornholio on the time he met Bill Clinton

“George Bush doesn't care about Cornholians”

~ Kanye West on Cornholio

“Are you threatening me?”

“He is from Nicaragua.”

~ Adam West on TP

“We are ALL bungholes!!!!!”

~ Eminem on Cornholio

“I need PCP for my bunghole!!”

“You do not want to feel the wrath of my bunghole!!!!!”

~ Cornholio angry

“Do you any TP??”

~ Cornholio asking for TP

“ I think that Cornholio wants Tp. Hmmm...”

~ Captain Obvious on Cornholio
Heh heh. For those who don't like funny crap, the fart-knockers at Wikipedia have and article about The Great Cornholio. Heh heh.
The image of the beautiful and glorious leader, gracefully raising his beautiful arms. DO YOU HAVE ANY TP!

The Great Cornholio is the king ofBungholio. He needs teepee for his bunghole. Would you like to see his bunghole? There will be more bungholes after him. HE IS CORNHOLIO!! HE HATH NO BUNGHOLE. For there is but one bunghole, The Almighy Bunghole. There is no bunghole but Bungholio and Cornholio is his Prophet.

History of Cornholio[edit]

The Great Cornholio is the first king of Bungholio which capital is Lake Titicaca. (Titty! Ca-ca! Hehehehehehehehehehe.) Despite being called the Bungholian ruler, he ironically has no anuses (The same conditon that afflicts the Republican Party). Tormented by this, Cornholio fell in a state of denial and convinced himself that he indeed had a bunghole. Believing that he had a bunghole needing wiped, he went on a grand quest to the United States in search for teepee. While he was there, he was threatened by an INS agent and then transported to Mexico, then to Nicaragua. He soon escaped back into Nicaragua and would form the nation of Bungholio.

Cornholian Rites and Rituals[edit]

Soon after their visit to the United States, the Bungholian tribe, in order to honor their new king, changed their names to the Cornholians. They preceded to start a political party so that they could take over the US. That has no relevance, however. Anyway, new members of the tribe are required to show everyone the probes in their bunghole. After that, the Cornholian initiation ritual consists of a copious amounts of Jolt cola, NoDoze and cocaine to induce the proper state of mind, then listen to Middle-eastern chants, and watch large amounts of porn. The yearly Cornholian Christmas party is another interesting ritual. First is a feast consisting of demonically possessed turkey, evil eggs, and Brain Nog.

The Great Cornholian War[edit]

Soon, the Great Benewah, leader of the Le'onfantata tribe declared war on the Cornholians. Then it was discovered that Benewah's balls were inside the vagina of his wife, and he was then discredited as a leader and forced to step down, ending the war.

The war came as a heavy price for The Great Cornholio. He was assasinated on the streets of Bogota, Columbia by orders of Venezuelan Dickhed Hugo "My Ass Hurts" Chavez. His remains were never found and the streets are aways haunted at night with the spirit of one looking for teepee for his bunghole.he would then be brought back to life and he lives on today and still is king of bungholio.

Books by Cornholio[edit]

"The Search for T.P."

"Trick or Treat, You Son of a Bitch: A Cornholian Guide to the Harvest Holidays"

"Moby Dick" Heheheheh! That's pretty cool!

See Also[edit]