The MatriX3 Trilogilogilogy

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“In Soviet Russia, EMP charges YOU!!”

~ Russian Reversal on Matrix Sentinels

The Matrix Trilogilogilogy or those films that are based on real life where we can do really cool stuff easy, is a group of, hold on a minute, 1 ... 2 ... 3, there we go, three films by a couple of brothers, the Wachouski(originally Ma Chous k) brothers. @ the time of creation the wachouski brothers were a bunch of computer geeks on weed, so have been charged with $200 000 000 in fines(that's only half of the first matrix film's cost to buy on DVD, in the real world any way, you know, not the matrix one.) since they plotted this stupid piece of shit movie just so that some nerds who haven't gotten laid in like forever will be able to make some sense out of their meaningless lives in hopes of fucking chicks like trinity.

Main Plot[edit]

The film is based on the thought that we are all trapped by machines (really? machines again? how many times can machines take over?) in a fictional world that is all in our head. This world is much better than the real world, in which you are hunted down and killed by machines as they can only live off humans by turning them into D batteries, as told by Morpheus in the first one, just titled the matrix. Morpheus had spent all his life (even since he was a baby?) looking for Neo (Keanu Reeves) to help save the human race from becoming batteries and live peacfully in the shitty citty of Zion. If Neo had taken both the red pill and the blue pill at the same time the matrix head would exploded and neo would simply pwn the matrix and there would be end movie and no more sequels he would live happily ever after and know what the matrix is at the same time la la la.

The Matrix[edit]

The first movie follows the events of Neo being released from the matrix. Just before smith ( a great mudafuda agent ) and a couple of poofy agents come and find him and bust a cap in his ass Neo is saved by Trinity (not to be confused with the Christianity version) and a couple of others that aren't important to the plot so were killed off without second thoughts. In the end Neo is able to basically stop bullets with his thoughts and was able to rise from the dead. Trinity has some kind of divine powers cause she brought Neo back to life (Neo was shot 10 times by smith) with a only a kiss! very weird!

NOTE: the day of filming of the rising scene was April 1st. As a joke, the two poofy agents put real bullets into smith's gun, so when Keanu was shot, that was real blood. As he still managed to survive, it is now believed that Keanu is officially not a cat - which would only survive being shot 9 times. He has been proven to be better than 50 Cent himself, as he was "shot 9 times and still walking".

The Matrix 2: Return to Matrix Island[edit]

Basically the same plot again but this time a lot more Smiths like 200 or 300 of him or even over 9000. Oh and this time there was Chinese dude with cool glasses that i wanted, the fighting one not the keymaker. And some better music. Oh and Neo and Trinity had sex for half the movie with nice softcore techno music in the backround. Plus there was these two vampire ghost zombie dudes that could cheat death just like Neo except apparently they must have been allergic to fire or something because they assploded - when your ass explodes. Actually, it was quite different come to think of it...

The Matrix 3: Basically the Same Name as the second one but slightly different 'cause this one has a GIANT ENEMY CRAB[edit]

Neo's glorious comeback against Smith.
Morpheus in the third Matrix.

Really can't be bothered. Can't believe that Smith has made it this long in the film. Then he blinds Neo but Neo survives cause as we all know he is the main character and he can cheat death like on the first movie when he is shot like 10 times by smith and survives. At the end of the film, he saves the human race by defeating Smith. By the way, if Neo couldn't defeat Smith, does that mean the Matrix would be a sweaty place filled with men?


Since its creation God has claimed that the idea that he would create a world where everything was a computer program was an absolute lie so decided he would write a virus to destroy the Wachouski Bros. The virus was called Chuck Norris. Though some say it was a Myth many IT directors believe that this virus was faught by a man who goes by the name of Anon. He tried to kill the virus by pressing the Ctrl key but as we all know now... You cant Ctrl Chuck Norris

A Theory from Some Bunch of Nerds[edit]

Some bunch of nerds who can't live life to the full developed this theory that the pitiful life they lead is all an illusion.

The theory: If George Bush can dodge a shoe in an unprovoked attack we must be in the matrix.

This theory is popular to some members from new religious cults or people who are bored with their lives.

This is how some of the nerds saw the moment when George Bush dodged a shoe.


  • Real Life

See Also[edit]

Welsh Congo