The Mighty Boosh

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search


Charlie Brown — A little love.jpg Stop hand nuvola alternate.svg This article needs love Stop hand nuvola alternate.svg
This article is currently in a bad state, but all it needs is a little love.
Please give some love by rewriting it.


All hats suit me!
Bouncywikilogo6.gif
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about The Mighty Boosh.

The Mighty Boosh is not only a show, a band, thong maker, a small boy crying over a vicious rape and salad company but also the name given to a cultural phenomenon which starts out unique and exciting (for examples, see Nazism and pregnancy) before rapidly deflating into self-parody over a time span of roughly three series (see Nazism and pregnancy). The end of such a cycle is marked by droves of overweight, fake, annoying, skinny-jean clad 12-year-old females taking to the streets and proclaiming that their name is Old Gregg, whilst dry-humping any passing male who bears a vague resemblence to Noel Fielding.

The show follows the adventures of a cardigan with a mustache (Howard) and his girly Cheekbone-reading companion (Vince)as they travel on a psychedelic trip through time and space to reclaim their dignity and find more old ideas to re-hash.

In the beginning, God created the Gerth, the Heavens and Man and Woman, and then he said, 'Gosh damnit! We need something to liven this place up.' So the Monty Python was cast upon the Earth to humour the hippies and tickle politicians. But then they got old and separated, and God was not pleased. And from his anger, the anti-matter of Boosh, only found underneath LG fridges and behind conventional ovens, was born.

Though government reports claim that 'The Boosh' consists of both Noel Fielding AND Some Other Guy ( we don't believe them), it would appear that for some unimaginable reason, more teenage girls would rather scream for the nose-smashed-in-with-a-brick-but-the-eyeliner-and-ridiculously-huge-hats-make-it-okay beauty that is Noel Fielding than the nothern, jazzy, cardiganed (and somewhat sexy) 40-going-on-41-year-old Julian Barratt (Yes, the other one does indeed exist). Research began on this strange phenomenon in 1994, but, as of yet, results are inconclusive, though preliminary studies have show that 9/10 13-year-old girls believe Fielding's appeal comes from him being famous. I mean come on if anything gets popular girls will rape it. However those with common sense clearly see that Julian Barratt is the more attractive of the double acts, his good looks have been attributed to his beady eyes.

'The Boosh' revolves around Some Ugly Bloke, convenient comedy 'straight' man and all around prop (can be seen in Series 1 as a door wedge) and Vince(MegaStarSupermodelOneManShowSexSymbolAllAroundCreativeGeniusWearerOfLuminousOrangePleatherLederhosen), part-time rent boy, part-time lesbian, as they continue their wildly-exotic, Certificate 18 attempts to deny any homoerotic sexual tension whilst working as zoo keepers, bin men, pop stars, Radio 4 presenters, child murderers, fluffers, table lamps, dinnerladies and extras on primetime British soap operas. In their spare time, they are shown to enjoy crotchet, ending world hunger and crawling up children's playground slides with Courtney Love.

The show has had mixed reviews. While some critics describe the show as "hip and sexy" or like "Morecambe and Wise reinvented for the 21st century", some harsh critics have even gone to the lengths to describe the Boosh as, 'utter, utter, garbage,' 'Worse than those crisps I found under my couch,' and 'Monty Python rip-offs,' to which me wonders who actually compares such a show to the likes of Monty Python.

What is a Boosh and Why is it Amusing?[edit]

Contrary to popular belief, the title of The Mighty Boosh was not conceived from Noel's brothers hair in childhood. It was in fact envisaged when Noel and Julian were traveling in the Sahara desert, tired and weary from lack of food and fluids. Their throats were parched and the both of them were nearly about to decease. That is until a large, really big, huge bush came into vision. At first, they believed it to be an illusion, which is common in deserts, but as they approached it; they realized they were saved. For what stood tall in the shade of the roughly 1,000 foot tall bush was a resort dubbed "The Mighty Boosh." It specialized in spa treatments and was world renown for it's steaks and above average water. Thankfully, Julian still had his credit card on him and so they were allowed to enter, enabling them to be rescued from the harsh Sahara climate.

To this day, the two of them have never forgotten and are forever thankful to that resort. So when they had a chance to pay tribute, they did it in the subtle yet most sincere way of naming a television show The Mighty Boosh.

Howard[edit]

He is one of the main, major characters of the show. He is an admitted mass murderer who is also an ardent fan of reggae. It's also well-known that he is a feminist to a strong degree, and has made the ground-breaking discovery of the new sound. This was after an episode of a big purple lollipop and a spider penis man. The most interesting thing about him, is his HAIR! He is attracted to Vince, but will never admit it, he likes sexual tension. He is unlucky with the ladies (and men), but did manage to give Vince a good snogging on his 32nd birthday, though a secret homoerotic fan made them kiss otherwise he would have killed Vince. He admitted mass murder in 2030 BC, using a bag of conkers and a sachet of Heinz Ketchup filled with Dog Semen. Howard also performed guitar in the Jazz Fusion Quartet, called "Toast of Permission", and with their well known song called, "Desolate Shore". Howard's proudest acheivements are most definetly his trohpy for 'the smallest eyes ever' Actually Howard made that Competition up himself when Vince said he wasn't a winner...

Vince[edit]

Vince Noir. Despite this indisputable fact Vince is known to have a fetish for more tall jazzy men and Robert Smith. He also has several clones that go out and rape other characters at random intervals when they need a chuckle. These clones include Old Gregg, The Hitcher, and Tony Harrisson. Sadly, his simple charm and not-so-simple-dress were utterly ruined by 12 year old fangirls.

Vince doing what he does best

Old Gregg[edit]

The only reason this show has fans. Watch out, he may be under your bed. Old Gregg is the first and only thing most Americans see of the show, most have no idea what the Mighty Boosh is. "Do you love me? Are you playing your love games with me?" He/She is confused with his/her gender. Maybe because it's a hermaphrodite fish that lives in a cave. Go figure. Old Gregg gives out his number to small children/men and has a strange obsession with chubby people. Twelve years ago Old Gregg had a strange accident where he was slapping Keith Richards in the head, and an extremely creamy and gloopy substance emerged from Keith's left earlobe. Old Gregg put it in a brown paper bag and sat on it. Thus, cheesecake was created. But Margaret Thatcher stole his recipe. Old Gregg can now be seen in desguise as lady gaga, performing not so great hits as lovegame, the series two hit from the mighty boosh.

Milky Joe[edit]

By far the most popular and successfully excellent character, Milky Joe is a coconut with holes in it stuck onto a wooden stick. He likes to dress in a tea towel, in respect to his native France's style of clothing. A former member of the once great coco race, he was destroyed when Master Chief gunned him down in Halo 7 after refusing crystal meth. Existing as just a head, he traveled through time and space in hopes of navigating his way to heaven but was intercepted by Howard, who restored Milky to less than 1/9000 of his former glory. In time, he learned to call Howard papa, which is coco for "festering twat" but is unknown in French. After selling the Boosh down the river for some crystal meth, Milky's rise to fame was astronomical, appearing on football merchandise and writing his autobiography entitled 'My Line in the Sand'. Milky Joe is currently president of the world.

The Crack Fox[edit]

Was once rich and powerful. Found a copy of cheekbone and became obsessed with London. He caught a train to London and ended up in a load of gay bars off his tiny face. The party life took its toll and he ended up begging for cheese on the streets of Dalston. His favourite time is diddly needle time. He wants the magic juice!

Crimping[edit]

Wanna see my downstairs mix-up?

37.5 times per episode, the Boosh perform epic metaphysical poetry known as 'Crimps' in order to convey the deep philosophical concepts of the age. It is widely believed that The Honey Monster stole the idea for 'Crimping' from Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt, who came up with the idea in the grief-stricken months following the death of Spongebob and Toucan Sam. (They perished together on a ship full of toasters).

Examples of Crimps include:

  • Love's Requiem.87
  • Elegy I: Tabloids
  • Elegy II: The Tabloids Strike Back
  • Elegy III: Return of The Tabloids
  • Camden, Camden! Camden, Dalston, Kentish Town!
  • O; Ye Tiny Goat
  • Bouncy, Bouncy Geldofs
  • Coke Fiend, Crack Whore, Tennis In The Morning
  • Table

Another Crimp of note is the 1973 classic, 'Tie a Yellow Ribbon'.

See also[edit]