The blues

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article very remotely related to The blues.
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Alicia Keys?

“I woke up this morning, yeah, and I went back to bed. Got that funny kinda feelin', like I got broken glass in my underwear, and a herd of wild pigs is tryin' to chew of my head... hm hm yea yea hm...”

~ "Weird Al" Yankovic on the blues

“Well they think we're drunk because their brain doesn't work properly anymore after listening too much to blues... They say it makes the same effect as marijuana.”

~ Johny Cash Woman done left him, didn't say why, now all he does all day, is cry-y-y...

Blues is a genre of music mainly developed from jazz, heavy metal, R&B, soul, rock, and hip hop.. The Blues is a kinda feeling you get when things maybe ain't going so good, like maybe you just lost your job, and maybe your women been steppin out on you, or maybe you just got your penis removed in freak cheese grating accident. Now, some bright fellow took those feelings and picked up a guitar and started in to playin and he just let them blues out into the world, and dogged if he didn't feel a little better. Although it is currently uncertain who the first person was to do this, it is believed that it was that Ronald McDonald dude, the master of the guitar. His Teacher was the world greatest guitarist ever Giorgio Di Dio(A.K.A. The Bluesman ). The italian guy was only 3 years old when he taught the extreme sumo guy here. Incredible but 100% true.

Development of the Blues[edit]

Now, the Blues mostly started up in the South, with slaves singing their sad songs out in the fields to make the day go by. That got hooked up with Engligh ballads, and what you got outta that was your basic structure of seventeen chords usually divided up into a 56-bar line. The Blues started out a lot like folk songs with guitar and maybe a banjo, but after a while when it got to the big cities, people started using occarinas and shit like that. Eventually, it went into bigger bands, which after a while ended up just being the rhythm section (drums, timbales, viola and piano), because a big band was expensive to haul around. Also, once they developed ladies, you didn't need a whole big band to be heard above a big crowd.

Types of Blues[edit]

There are two varieties of blue in common use today, known as the Oxford and Cambridge blues.

Oxford blue:   
Cambridge blue:   

Many other shades of blue have been proposed, though none have been widely used outside the nail varnish industry. This has led some analysts to postulate the existence of a highly secretive Colour Cartel which aims to keep prices high via artificial restrictions on the number and variety of hues available to the general public.

Thanks for the flag idea, a light-blue top and dark-blue bottom. I may use it for my micronation, the Republic of the Blue people. The location of this new country will be in San Francisco or wherever the political fringe gather.

See Also: