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“This is an outrage!”

“I won't stand for this!”

“You know what the difference is between you and me? I make this look good.”

~ Will Smith on things he does to this that you don't.

“You can't touch this!”

~ MC Hammer on this

“There is absolutely no excuse for this.”

~ Oscar Wilde on this

“I've got a bad feeling about this.”

~ Obi-Wan Kenobi on this


~ Leonidas on this

“This is an article called 'this'.”

~ Captain Obvious on this

“Ris is rirreglular ras I can't say ris.”

~ Scooby doo on this

This is the opposite of that. This is an Uncyclopedia article; it was written by me, and is being read now by you. This has become one of the most controversial articles on Uncyclopedia due to its being the only article containing the words "Oscar Wilde is a sham."

The controversial nature of this article has created a cult following among those who don't know what they are talking about. They assert that all of the following lines appear in this article:

  • The truth is true
  • Lies are false
  • Wikipedia is true[citation needed]
  • Oscar Wilde is a sham[citation needed]
  • Uncyclopedia is made up
  • Everything I say is a lie. (but how can that be true if everything you say is a lie? But you are lying, so it must be true! But- Boom!)

This last statement has been particularly troublesome. Many read it, believing that everything in Uncyclopedia is true, only to discover, through Uncyclopedia itself, that Uncyclopedia is made up. (What idiots!) However, if Uncyclopedia is made up, then how do they know for sure that the statement "Unyclopedia is made up" is true? This has created a paradox, which has succeeded in sucking all of this article's cult following out of the space-time continuum. Most others deny that such a statement ever appeared in this article.

This is often confused with that, which is most assuredly not this, because that article could not possibly be this article.

It is important to note that this is not "this", but only an article about this.

In the end, the only absolute truth is this: 1=2

Also, I am a complete and total liar that likes the penis.

(Written by someone else.)

Actually, the phrase "Everything I say is a lie" does not mean that everything I say is the truth,but only SOME of what I say is the truth, and the rest is a lie. Did that just blow your fucking mind or what?

Things this is[edit]

Things this is not[edit]

  • A pipe
  • A good idea
  • Over
  • A drill, repeat
  • A drill
  • A serial killer
  • A box of killer serial, *cough*, cereal
  • What it looks like
  • World War 4.5
  • Marijuana
  • That
  • Someone Prince is suing.
  • Your mother
  • A big olde penis
  • Barack Obama
  • My mother?
  • a white nigger
  • Marty McFly
  • The right castle, your princess is in another castle.
  • Yellow