Tom Coburn

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Tom Coburn is currently the Junior Senator from the state of Oklahoma. He and Rick Santorum are the most prominent gay Republicans in the Senate at the moment.

Early Life[edit]

During Coburn's childhood, he was a huge fan of pornography. His favorite porno video was Schindler's List, but after expressing outrage that it was shown on prime time television, he quickly learned that it wasn't actually a porno video, but actually a serious film about the Holocaust. Coburn now masturbates to The Pianist, instead.

Coburn wanted to serve in the military, but there was a crossworld puzzle he really wanted to do. The conflict inVietnam was over by the time he finished it.

Senate Career[edit]

Coburn was elected in to the Senate in 2006. Highlights of his career include doing a crossworld puzzle during a Supreme court hearing and attempting to beat out Alan Keyes and Zell Miller for the title of "Most Batshit Insane Politician." The three of them are expected to settle this in a battle royale by the end of the year.