From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Travis.
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Alicia Keys?
Photo shoot for Invible Band CD

Travis are a banjo-pop band from Glasgow, Scotland. Their line-up comprises Fran "Scotch Egg" Healy (vocals, banjo), Dougie "Haggis" Payne (mandolin, banjo, wine glasses), Andy "Shortbread Finger" Dunlop (kazoo, electric banjo) and Neil "Ocean Pie" Primrose (coconut shells, banjo). Travis was a 29 year-old man whom played guitar.

Their most famous hit was "Why Does It Always Piss Down On Me?"

This posed the question:

Why does it always piss down on me?
Is it because God just took a pee? hates our music. Come on, give me some credit

To which the answer is: "Yes, plus you live in Glasgow", In Britain.

Some say that they are named after the lead character from the 1932 German expressionist film 'Taxi Driver', but this is unlikely since neither Taxis, nor Travises had yet been invented.


Travis was formed when the wee lads noticed that they all have Van Gogh's ear for music.


  • 1999: Why Does It Always Piss Down On Me?
  • 2000: Why Does It Continue To Always Piss Down On Me?
  • 2001: My Umbrella Broke And It's Still Pissing Down On Me
  • 2002: I Caught Pneumonia Cos It Didn't Stop Pissing Down On Me
  • 2003: I'm In My Grave And It's Still Pissing Down On Me Even Though I'm Underground And Can't Really Feel It
  • 2004: Take Your Gay Pisser Off of My Asshole You Dumb Fuck Shit!!!!!!!
  • 2005: I Love Cannibals that Eat Your Gay Dead Bitchy Penis!
  • 2006: Hitler Must Go and Fuck this Corpse Up Your Nigger's Big Penis and a Homo's Assy Bitch Fuck Cunt Shitter of a Twat!!
  • 2007: The Boy With No Name For Two Weeks Because We Couldn't Think Of Something Artsy Enough, We Went With Jaffa Cak...Clay
  • 2008: It's Pissed Through The Dirt and Now It's Pissing On My Corpse