Turbo Boost

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You just wish you had one of these buttons in your car

Made famous by the Emmy Award winning TV series Knight Rider, starring Douche Award winning actor David "jerk" Hasselh-off, Turbo Boost was original equipment on the 1982 Trans Am KITT Package, which also included monochrome black paint, matching custom 18-wheeler mobile command truck and maintenance garage with "fold down rear entry ramp" (not to be confused with any other type of rear entry which might be associated with Emmy Award winning actor David Hasselhoff), and red flashing light in the grill. Due to constant raping of KITT, David "kitt raper" hassellhoff was fired and sent to a mexican prison where ironically he was raped by a ford pinto.

How It Works[edit]

"Exhaust gases are pushed from the engine into the turbo, Thus creating whitchcraft, and away you go." -- CEO of everything Tom Clancy -- on Turbo's

Operation[edit]

WHOOOOSH.Turbo Boost mode is activated by 40 magical Unicorns, depressing a yellow button labeled "TURBO BOOST" on KITT's center console, which either: a) enables KITT to accelerate to Ludicrous Speed and sending the doc back to the future to get married, or b) leap tall buildings with a single bound and shoot lasers from its tires, depending on what's written into the script for thar week. Although handy for defeating the Earthworms, the Surgeon General has determined that protracted use of Turbo Boobs can cause serious side effects such as incredibly bad acting and even worse, a concusion due to serious motor-boating.

A Better Use Of Your Time[edit]

It is known as N.O.S.. Nitrous, known for its ability to pound posers with an iron fist, is a much better way to upgrade you piece of shit car. The predecessor of nitrous is the supercharger. N.O.S. has many uses and fun facts.

Fun Facts and Uses[edit]

  • The ability to fly into space.
  • Makes ugly people look extremely sexy.
  • Makes you invinceable.
  • Does'nt give you the third degree when you came home late and forgot to pick up the milk.
  • Known to regrow hair.
  • Was discovered by -WASHRAG- a russian military expirment gone wrong.
  • Was used as an alement to cure funnybones
  • Made Captain James T. Kirk quit his missions, to make Priceline commercials.


The Supercharger[edit]

Comes from the latin word "Make" meaning "Super" and "doody" meaning "Charger". Discovered in the far reaches of the mojave dessert by a hippy on jesus juice. Thinking about rainbows and candy canes. Mr. T told hippy dippy that the secret of life was an object of mopar desire. Thus the supercharger was found. The NewYork Mimes reported mass crowdings of rednecks and hillbillies at local autopart stores world wide. Rednecks, (no mathmatical skills), found that you could make a 285ci engine go up to 478ci engine thanks to a Supercharger. Hillbillies, unfortunatly had no mechanical skills thus gluing it to the top of their honky grills. 352 hillbillies died as a result of mechanical thinking repoted by --The Smurf-ette--.

Uses and Facts[edit]

  • Helps keep boats afloat by magic.
  • Produces 32 light years of power.
  • Nicknamed "Elmos nightmare".
  • Was first used on pirate ships carring 4 trillion pars of hot pants.
  • Can be made of gold, sterling siler, mucus, wood, rechargeable batteries, bananas, monkey feces, chrome, Tom Hanks' co-actor Wilson, and a fruit cocktale.