Tyringe

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Even if most people in this world are luckily unknowning, Tyringe is the headquarters of this world and every other city, county, union - everything else is considered a suburb of Tyringe. The evil ministers rule the world with iron fists, all in total secrecy so that no one can ever discover them and/or take them away from their thrones.

The rulers of Tyringe are split up into several groups, all under command of the Overlords.

Location[edit]

Tyringe is located there ^

With a population of over 6 billion (suburbs counted), Tyringe is quite a large city. In fact, it's the biggest in the world, but the narrowminded professors in the world doesn't seem to get it. The core of Tyringe, with vastly 5000 inhabitants, is located in northern Scania, the most southern county of Sweden, a country in Northern Europe, a non-American place that is.

Surroundings[edit]

Tyringe is surrounded by conquering cities and villages such as Röke (Smokie), Finja (Finyes), Hässleholm (Rattleislet) and Perstorp (Perscraft). (Articles on these are to come). These villages and cities doesn't know of Tyringe's plans to erase them from the surface of the earth and they will all die sooner or later, painlessly fortunately, when tyringe unleashes their nuclear mini-missiles on them.

Anyway, the nature in and around Tyringe are marvelous. there are great woods and dense forests, small waterfalls and lots of animals. It's kinda idyllic. Well, until the hunting season begins. The hunting season is the biggest cause of deaths in Tyringe and it's surroundings. 63% of all deaths from year 1996 to 2006 were caused by old men with guns that thought they where "aiming at a deer/moose/squirrel, but didn't see it really good thanks to their bad eyes/crappy glasses", alternatively "felt for trying out their latest homemade bomb/grenade".


History[edit]

Tyringe has a rich history, full of bloodshed and stuff, but also of empty spaces where nothing really happend. There are two versions of the history of tyringe


Official history[edit]

The official history of Tyringe begins around year 1000 when a man settles with his family in the area. They get neighbours after many years and the place serves as a post-station. A village grows around the post-station and when it's big enough, it becomes part of Finja (Finyes).


Real History[edit]

The real story is much more fascinating. In the 9th century, some mad vikings known as Ragnar the Blue and Harold Whitebeard, and their families and slaves of course, built their homes on a hill in the area. The early Viking-tribes and warlords where at war with each other and Scania was a land in turmoil. Many of Ragnar's and Harold's relatives moved to the area, bringing their slaves as well. After a hundred years one couldn't see the differense between full-blood vikings and slaves in the village. They where all mixed together and they had created a new way of leading. Once every year they had elections and the winner there would rule the village for a whole year. In 926, there was the first tie in the elections. Two men, Tyr and Inge, stood as leaders. For the first time in the village's history there were two leaders, and to celebrate this unique happening (which in fact has never occurred again after that), the peasants named the village after the two leaders to TyrInge (both first letters in the name were capitalized because no one of them wanted to the small, weak one. This was changed when Inge died). They had a great party and everyone got drunk and puked.


In 988 the ruling system was changed dramatically. The current leader of Tyringe, his/her name and identity is still unknown, decided to take total control of the region by sending men to the neighbour villages to make up stories about the leaders there and start revolts against them.

Then a lot of other stuff happend, but since it's quite boring the read I'll just skip it.

In time, the leaders of Tyringe got men in every town on Earth, brainwashing the kings and presidents to follow Tyringe - hiding it from the people. In modern day, Tyringe indirectly controls the world, and the leaders can play with the world leaders as puppets. Of course no one knows it and that's good for the evil leaders of the village!

Mafia[edit]

Tyringe probably has the wimpiest mafia in the history of the universe. They call people by phone, asking them if they can threaten them for 20 crowns (~2 euros). If people say no, they beg for pardon and promise not to call again. In fact, so few people have ever heard of them that they're pretty much unknown - being able to read this text is luck alone!