UnNews:Britney shaved her head "because of spelling test"

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23 August 2007

Spears, shortly after applying the "shears"

HOLLYWOOD, California -- FRUITY NUTCASE Britney Spears shaved her head because she was convinced "it would improve her spelling", according to a friend. The singer stunned fans in January when she cut off her own hair in a Los Angeles salon in front of paparazzi photographers.

She has never explained the gesture - but a friend claims she was convinced that "baldies" were bound to be more intelligent because "the little brain pixies liked to have fresh air". Britney was due to undergo a spelling test and was thought to be struggling on "SH" and "CH" words.

The friend told Unnews, "it was like a mental block to the girl, whenever asked to spell a "CH" or "SH" word she would just freeze and insist on adjourning to the ladies room to 'powder her nose', so to speak. She would then return to the room 'off her cake', drop her panties and play her labia like a banjo.

"It is strange because Britney was quite competent at "KN" and "PH" words, as long as they had no more than one syllable."

Ms Spears went on to fale the test after reportedly speling 'Chatty' as ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM.