UnNews:Dixie rallies to celebrate Black History Month

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8 February 2010

Southern-style celebration of Black History Month.

PURTY MOUTH, Arkansas -- Rednecks are pouring into town for the You Sure Got A Purty Mouth Black History Month Hoedown. The annual event draws white supremacists, Ku Klux Klansmen, militant Aryans.

"We're here to party like it's 1859," said one besotted attendee. "Just for this one week, we gather to remember how good our forefathers had it, with all that free labor and ready access to sex."

"This is a celebration of Black history," commented Pastor Luther Giblets of the local Eighth Baptist Church. "However, unlike the rest of the nation, we recall the history of Blacks in this country prior to the Northern Incursion fondly, and don't pay no mind to things since then."

Unable to find Afro-Americans to service the celebration in true Dixie style, participants had to make do with local boys and girls in blackface, serving up food and drink, and pampering them in rest rooms.