UnNews:Prozac given to tropical storm
14 May 2008
MIAMI, Florida -- Scientists have recently discovered that giving prozac to tropical depressions can keep them from becoming full-fledged hurricanes. This was a bold step in controlling weather phenomena. Previously, researches at the National Hurricane Center in Miami had tried Zoloft, Welbutrin, and various MAOI's without success. Prozac (generic Fluoxetine) has been seen to have the best results in raising the spirits of most tropical depressions.
The operations have been carried out by cloud-seeding strategic parts of a hurricane with a powdered mixture of the popular anti-depressant, vitamin D, and St John's Wort (a popular potion prescribed by insane Naturopaths and Homeopaths. Never mind, thay're all insane).
Scientists at the center expressed deep regret that their findings were not allowed to be tested in Myanmar. "We'd really like to see if we get the same results with a cyclone as we've witness with hurricanes", said one researcher. "The problem is the Myanmar government. They claim that everyone in their country is already happy and there is no need for prescription SSRI's. They're just anti-progress."
- Noah Fence "[ Psychotropics in the tropics]". New England Journal of Medicine and Weather, May 14, 2008