UnNews:Schwarzenegger endorses gay lifestyle

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13 October 2007

Golden State High School coeds admire classmate Johnny Logan's newest outfit

SACRAMENTO, California -- In his ongoing support of gays, lesbians, transgender, and bisexual persons, California’s Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has signed a bill that replaces such terms as “mother” and “father” with “caregiver,” outlaws any negative reference to “alternative sex and gender,” promotes the feminization of schoolboys, and forces boys to use girls’ restrooms and locker rooms and vice versa whether they want to do so or not.

Parents’ values don’t matter,” Schwarzenegger told Unnews’ reporter Lotta Lies. “As governor, I am terminating parental rights.”

Schools,” he maintains, “are, and should be, sexualized indoctrination centers that promote homo-bi-trans-sex issues and concerns over sexist heterosexual matters.”

Critics of the governor’s decision warn the rest of the nation that, “as California, the land of nuts and fruits goes, so goes the rest of the nation, because textbook publishers will be likely to cater to the Golden State’s needs at the expense of those of lesser customers’.”

Gov. Schwarzenegger explains why he signed SB 777: "Boys will be girls, and girls will be boys."

“For too long,” Schwartzenegger said, “schools have been biased in favor of marriage between males and females, which frequently results in the birth of children. It is high time, and past time, for the reverse discrimination against breeders that SB 777 provides. From now on, California--and, eventually, Californians--will favor alternative sex and gender as schoolchildren learn about reading, writing, arithmetic, and homosexual, bisexual, and transgender sex. California is proud to lead the way in the feminization of America and the safeguarding of girly boys.”

Under the new law, both boys and girls will be encouraged to cross dress, and jockstraps and strap-on dildos will be available to girls and bras and panties will be distributed to boys. For students over the age of 12, the state will pay for sex-reassignment surgery on demand, without parental notification. Johnny may go to school one morning, and Susie may come home that afternoon or vice versa.

Homecoming kings and queens may be either male or female--or both. Teachers are required to call students by the names that the pupils prefer, even if the names are those of the opposite sex.

“Boys will be girls, and girls will be boys, especially in the Golden State,” Schwartzenegger declared, explaining why he signed the bill into law.

A German immigrant whose father was a Nazi during World War II, Schwarzenegger, who denies that he is anti-Semitic any more than he is heterophobic, says he also plans to sign a bill that denies that the holocaust occurred or that there is any racial or ethnic group such as Jews.

The world, critics contend, now know why Schwarzenegger ran for the state’s highest office.