UnNews:UnConsortium launches dating prep for H-games

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8 December 2006

Need help meeting the girl of your dreams?

AMSTERDAM, The Netherregions -- UnConsortium representatives today announced a new service UnHitch, which will provide best-of-breed dating prep school service to an ever growing populace. UnConsortium cited that with the ever decreasing social ability of today's otaku and closted teens, levels of social ineptness have grown to the point where a teen attempting to win the heart of an animated girl in a video game designed to aid masturbation were unable to do so, even with the aid of cheat codes. Their new service will prep young audiences requiring social skill enhancement to more effectively understand and earn the hearts of their animated companions.

Pricing is reported to start at around $9.95 a minute, and all calls over ten minutes will include a complementary copy of "Hentai Games for Dummies". UnConsortium stock rose 10% on the news.