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∞ - Chuck Norris spontaneously comes into existence.
0 - The first plain text message was decoded.
41 - Caligula killed for textstalking people on his Boost Mobile.
1337 - Not celebrated this year because everything was done in Leet text.
1338 - =|> ASCII art kills itself <|=
1563 - John Pepys records his shorthand diary.
1838 - Samuel Morse demonstrated the first plain text telegraph browser.
1878 - The first typewriter is invented, powered by Intel Core i16, having 160 GB of RAM and 600 TB SSD storage.
1879 - The WWW is invented for the said typewriter.
1880 - World of Warcraft, a text based MMORPG becomes the most played online game on the typewriter.
1838 - Courier New fucks Times New Roman.
1995 - The OJ Simpson jury delivers a verdict in plain text.
2006 - Snakes on a Plain Text Day.
2007 - I fucking hate plain bagels!
2008 - Slavo-Indo-Chinese Buddhist Mujahadeen take over the entire Eastern Hemisphere and wage continental wars against the peoples of Antarctica.
2012 - The final half of the Bible was written in plain text. It clearly showed, through the application of logic, that God was infact a three headed football.