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This user is a zombie

Give up your brains, and walk away.

“I'd hit it.”

~ User:AhhDiddums on Self
This user is a boy and is made of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails.

UnNews Logo Potato.png This user is a reporter for UnNews because they couldn't get a job at a real newspaper.
Tux-thinkpad.png This user supports free operating systems because he/she is basically a cheapskate.

Clock.gif This user has been on Uncyclopedia for
13 years and 3 months.

Stop hand nuvola alternate.svg
This user has been blocked
3.14159 times.
Hammer and sickle.png This user is a

& is working on their
Lenin mustache! ☭
Numbersix.gif This user is not a number, s/he is a free wo/man!

This user is pilfering ye booty!

Wiki.png This user uses Uncyclopedia as his or her primary point of reference.
Pi3.14.jpg This user loves pi
Angrygod.gif This user hates religion and is a sinner through and through!
Clown chili peppers.jpg This user fears the clowns.
Pegasus small.png This user is convinced that any Pegasus is far superior to a Unicorn. No unicorn small.png

Earth.gif This user can be found on the Uncyclopedia Frappr Map.

I've obviously had hundreds of girlfriends!!!

The prophecy revealed so long ago hath finally been brought forth, as I am the foretold bringer of the downfall of Uncyclopedia (and those worthless fucking olds). Well, mostly just the olds.

About Me[edit]

My name is Cory, but "douchebag" will suffice. My location is a mystery... but if I was up your ass you'd know where I was!

I'll probably have sex with you if you bake me cookies.

Any page edits I make that turn out to be terrible, I just tell people I'm Stephen King and never talk about it again.

For your own safety, DO NOT open this door!!!

Why I'm Here[edit]

  • Become an admin just so I have power to abuse.
  • Uncyclopedia is the Hot Topic to Wikipedia's Gap. All the more attractive 12 year olds come here X-D
  • This is the best place to not have a life.

I'm An Asshole[edit]

Rape is such a negative word. They should call it "surprise sex."


I Am A Purveyor of Knowledge![edit]

Proof that John Grisham is My Bitch[edit]

I'm a Poet, and I Didn't Know It! (OMGLOLOL s000 cl3v3r!)[edit]

I r t3h Journalist! OH NOES![edit]

August, 2008[edit]

April - May, 2008[edit]

March - May, 2007[edit]

Februrary, 2007[edit]