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"Mommy needs a pick me up." --AmericanBastard 23:36, 22 April 2007 (UTC)

AmericanBastard: is a half German, quarter Jewish, 113/17th Klingon, 3 QUARTER JELLY DOUGHNUT, and a highly sacrilegious and inflammatory two-legged mammalian with fingers and some pubic hair. Often claims to be American though some question the nominality as to whether he/she is from the ubiquitous America (U.S.A.) or Brazil. AmericanBastard encourages you to ask him/her this question, even though you probably could care less, please do this so that he/she may proudly ignore you.

Member since Dec 2006. Feedback (-42)



  • DJ cockspank - HUFFED* My first article ever. This article was so incredibly vain that if you ever red it, your veins would've popped out of your skin and slithered away like snakes near a fire. Persistant recreations of it granted me a very sexy ban of 3 months, an attempted suicide over uncyc, and Rasputin's pickled loins... In a jar!!

Banished from Uncyclopedia in 1984 as DJ cockspank for vanity. Felt ashamed, discouraged and unfunny. As a result, I mutated into a caterpillar and sought seclusion in some cave to ponder my greivances for 8 months. Mutated again, only this time into a butterfly and happily returned to the faceless internet community of uncyclopedia to waste more time with people who think they're funny. (see picture; I now serve as the gunpowder in war canons for launching Bibles at primeval heathens.)

Me hope u injoyed résumé,, do I get job now?

ThinkerToilet.jpg This user is a member of the Reviewing Committee, because they are self opinionated knowitalls.

US flag.png This user is American
...and unabashedly proud of it!
(List of American Uncyclopedians)
Sabatier.jpg This user is a member of the American Otaku Association. They guard Japan-based articles with the zeal of a fanboy and the grace of manga.


Domokunyellownbackground.jpg This User is cleaning latrines for the Grue Army. DON'T FEAR HIM.
This user is unsure of his or her gender and doesn't want to know.