User:Ggarfield/Goroxide Ultimatum

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search

It was 22:00 hours North Dermish Galactic time in the year 2007 on the date, 20th, of September, when the Goroxides first landed on this planet. Wishing to establish contact, the Goroxides used their advanced technology to access the human internet. What they found was unimaginable! They found Uncyclopedia!


The Goroxides read all the policies of Uncyclopedia, and determined that it was a legitimate database of the finest quality with highly dedicated editors. They were glad to have found such a good resource, because they soon discovered that many of the things they would encounter on this planet were highly complicated such as: Black People, Chuck Norris, Cats with guns, and Jesus. Sending probes ahead of the team into Los Angeles, the Goroxides found everything about Black People that Uncyclopedia had told them to be true.

The Goroxides Contribute[edit]

Now that the Goroxides had gained a great wealth of knowledge for their planet, they wished to give something back to Earth in the form of knowledge. Top Goroxide scientists present on the mission worked countless hours to write completely factual documents about their people and home planet. Examples of these articles included: Goroxides: The Great Explorers, Nimgog: The Cure to Cancer, Visipolli: The Cure to World Hunger, and The Art of Nesputzu: How YOU can have better sex tonight.

The Unspeakable[edit]

Just before leaving, the Goroxides checked to make sure their articles were absolutely perfect. What they found, none could have imagined! The priceless articles the Goroxides had left for the technologically inferior humans had all been huffed. Greatly disheartened, the Goroxides reported the news to their supreme commander, ZEENOCH 22.B. ZEENOCH 22.B was outraged by the foolishness of the various Admins who had huffed the articles mercilessly. In response, ZEENOCH 22.B has ordered the creation of this article through the mind-controlled human <insert name here>.

The Ultimatum[edit]

ZEENOCH 22.B considers this article to be the last chance for the foolish humans to redeem themselves. If the Admins can bear to leave this article alone for one whole year, ZEENOCH 22.B will remove this article and resubmit the huffed articles. If, however, the foolish Admins put their paws on this article in any way, ZEENOCH 22.B will immediately begin an invasion of Planet Earth and a subsequent annihilation of all Admins and enslavement of the remaining population. Again, this is your last and only hope for survival, please proceed with caution! Thank you, and have a nice day.

Only YOU can save your planet from enslavement by the Goroxides!