- Your mother is so fat, when her telegraph machine beeps, people are quick to draw the conclusion that she is backing up.
Hi, my name is Ross. The following things about me are almost certainly true:
- I am not a pipe.
- I do not have more than 2 Arms. However, I do have 4 eyes.
- I think Scooters are pretty much the best thing ever, after bagels.
- I am < 100 years old.
I was given the
|The Joseph McCarthy Award of Continuity|
My Article Santa Clause has been nominated for Feature Article. Please vote for it!
I created the following Category, and have been either the author or primary contributor of the following group of articles. Please, dear god, feel free to add articles to this category. As for the ones I've written, damned if I don't say so myself, I'm proud of them (even if my proofreading isn't exactly what you would call "thorough":
- Frosty The Snowman
- Santa Claus is Coming To Town
- Krampus - (Thanks to KP for the picture and the suggestion.)
- North Pole
- Papa Smurf
- Roy Horn
- Santa Claus
- Santa's Toy Shop
- The Sleigh
- The Smurfs
- Santa and the Prostitute
I authored, or was majority contributor/significant revisor on the following, which I am also proud of:
- Iran-Contra Affair
- drug dealer
- Martian the Conqueror
- Morrissey Dancing
- Fortress of Solitude
I created the following stub(s). They're somewhat good ideas that must be expanded. Please, please consider adding to them.
I am currently working on the following:
- Keebler Elves
- Department Store Santa Claus
- The Great Morricide (A Battle Between Mozzers and Morrissey Dancers For Domination of the Sport.)
- The Iran-Cola Affair, a historical discussion of the hostages-for-sodas scandal, and the war that broke out in the wake of the scandal, events that rocked America in the 1980s.
- Smurflam - the religion of the Smurfs.
- Christmas In July
Someone else brilliantly got things rolling on The Keebler Rebellion. It's hilarious.
Images I've created:
see The Smurfs for more details.
NOTE: I realized after I started writing that I should create an account. As a result, you'll see my ISP, rather than my name, on quite a few of my early contributions. I promise I'm not simply lamely biting off other people's efforts and hard work. However, I am a shameless whore!)