User talk:Col.swordman/Archive 3

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search

I think Alan Jones has been hitting UnCyc[edit]


Eeeeeevil? Me?---Quill.gifRev. Isra (talk) 01:17, 29 October 2006 (UTC)

Oh, you tricked everyone (or just me?) into continuing that discussion so you can go and ban more open proxies. Are you not eeeeeevil? -- The Colonel (talk) 01:31, 29 October 2006 (UTC)
oh, that. well, i figured that when I used a header like "Useless Constribution designed only to infuriate Anon Slashy into revealing another of his proxies" that I was being obvious. I guess it was a bit evil though.---Quill.gifRev. Isra (talk) 01:51, 29 October 2006 (UTC)

Umm, yeah[edit]

Right you are about the VFD stuff. I never nom'd something for VFD before so I n00b'd up and forgot. I swear by all that is cream-filled it will never happen again. Probably. --Anyone 15:38, 6 October 2006 (UTC)

Comments deported by the Taiwanese Authority[edit]

Thanks for your efforts, Colonel. I'm sorry to hear that you spent so much time and still found your efforts fruitless. If you like, you can emaile or upload it onto my users page and I'll check it out. Can you give me some info about your hardware and software? Perhapes I may be of some help. Cheers! zim_ulator

The preceding unsigned comment was added by zim_ulator (talk • contribs)


The whole Martin Van Buren thing should be the focus of the article. I think the "Hate Page Generator" should be a couple links, one at the bottom, and one at the top that allow the reader to create the page, but still allow them to consider the article an article. The whole "Hate Page Generator" should be a side-note to Martin Van Buren, and not take over completely. Maybe you should make it a "HowTo" article and try to have it featured. I dunnow. It's just that Martin Van Buren has need of featuring, and after that, it doesn't matter what happens to it. So once it has been featured (or not) we can make it into your proposal. But for now, just try to make it a side-note in the article, okay? Sounds good?

--The Llama Llover

Of Course![edit]

Yeah, I'm sure it will gather a lot of new fans, but we might lose a lot of old ones. That's what I'm worried about. How about, if this article is not featured, I give you absolute control of it to shape it however you want. If, and only if it's not featured. But go ahead and add the "subtle" links to the page, I'm sure it would improve it a lot, and you will get plenty of credit if it gets featured either way.

All in all, the idea is ingenious, but for now, don't mess with the page too much, because it still stands a pretty good chance of getting featured without the big changes. If it doesn't work, go ahead and do whatever with it, and take all the credit, I really don't care. I JUST WANT ONE OF MY ARTICLES FEATURED!!

The preceding unsigned comment was added by Llama-Llover (talk • contribs)

Seriously, I don't really think that's going to matter a lot. What I have got in the generator is basically your stuff, and unless this website has started to endorse plagiarism, however the script has changed, the final credit will still be yours. -- The Colonel (talk) 06:52, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Sounds Interesting[edit]

This is Llama-Llover here. Yeah, I've seen the hate page generator, and I think it is incredibly funny. If we could make a prominent link on the Martin Van Buren page to the generator, perphaps that would work? I'm not really "into" the inner-workings of Uncyclopedia yet, so I don't know how a double-article thing would work, but the idea is really good.

If Martin Van Buren is featured this time around, it would be a really nice addition, as long as it doesn't distract the reader's attention from the actual article about Martin Van Buren. So, yeah! If we could do that, and feature the hate-page-generator right next to the article, I'm all for it!

Good thinking, anyhows. Be sure to give yourself some credit, if anyone asks. Especially the Russians.

--The Llama Llover

Ok! Here's my plan:
On the Martin Van Buren side:
  1. Replace the content of the article with the template.
  2. Put a one-line notice at the top of the page saying that this is an advertising campaign for the Hate Page Generator.
On the Hate Page Generator side:
  1. Make a reference to the Martin Van Buren article, saying that the said president was "non-noteworthy" and deserved to be jabbed that way.
  2. Change the primary example from me to Martin Van Buren.
  3. Link readers to a few more examples like the one in the sandbox and emphasise that one can use the generator on a variety of purposes such as making inside jokes and "3-minute" political humour.

-- The Colonel (talk) 04:53, 2 October 2006 (UTC)

Here are the images (finally)[edit]

Sorry that took so long and I hope you still have time to do it.
Image:Ribena_carton_1.JPG Image:Ribena_carton_2.jpg Image:Ribena_carton_3.jpg
I did a few cause I didn't know which one would be best to use. It doesn't have to be as big as the original and it can be cropped too.
They look like bad quality but I think if you click the "download hi-res version" bit at the bottom you might get a better one? I don't really know and you probably know about that already, but just in case. :)
Thanks loads and loads! --Flyingfeline 18:27, 1 October 2006 (UTC)

Since my supervisor has put a barrel next to my temple, I think I'll just leave this until the next weekend. Hope you don't mind. Thanks for the pics by the way. :) -- The Colonel (talk) 03:03, 2 October 2006 (UTC)

You've just recieved a pie![edit]

    dQQQQp            qQQQQb
  dQp                      qQb
 dp                          qb
dp                            qb
qb                            dp
 Qb                          dpQ
 qQQb                      dQQp
  Q qQQQQb            dQQQQp Q
  qb     qQQQQQQQQQQQQp     dp
   Q.                      .Q
   `Qb                    dQ'
     qQb                dQp
       qQQQQb      dQQQQp

You've received this pie for greeting me. As an added bonus, it's {{Favourite_pie|Col.swordman/Archive 3}} flavoured! --Thematrixeatsyou 23:42, 28 September 2006 (UTC)

(Dribbling) Mmmmm... Pie! -- The Colonel (talk) 07:56, 29 September 2006 (UTC)


Dear Mr Swordman, could you use {{subst:Welcome}} and not {{Welcome}}. Thanks.... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

I am not really into the welcoming business but, anyway, alrighty then. -- The Colonel (talk)

American Fundie Magazine, Part II[edit]

This humble Uncyclopedian thanks you for your vote. It warms my jaded heart to know that there is, indeed, a place for satire on Uncyc, even the blunt, spooky shit.--Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 11:22, 23 September 2006 (UTC)


I think lots of people will miss you when you are gone, surely I will. I thought I would leave a nice message on your talk page, instead of a rant/curse/hatemail threat and/or declaration of War. You will go down in the annals of Uncyclopedia Lore as a Legend without much Fanfare. Your Sword will gleam brigtly in whatever sun you happen to worship. Your god is as good as any I guess... Have fun with school. I'm pretty swamped myself, so I should try to scale it back. I have one article for VFH, hopefully I'll get it. My very first!*weep* -- Sir Severian Severian1.jpg CUN.png (Sprich mit mir!) Kraut.png 14:26, 6 September 2006 (UTC)

I have to admit that I am not very good at writing articles, making pictures and stuff, but I volunteered my time here nonetheless, and I am proud of what I did. Really, despite occasional anonyance from some retards, I had a good time here, and I treasure every moment I had. And yeah, my god is there but I am quite sure he is not a Muslim one. *grin*Anyway, I haven't read your article yet, but I wish you good luck with the VFH nomination. -- The Colonel (talk) 08:06, 7 September 2006 (UTC)

I, too, don't want you gone. A brief visit once in a blue moon will be favorable colonel, but retirement? Please no, you're Uncyc's token Aussie, speakin' some weird ol' language.--Wit (tawk) 07:09, 18 September 2006 (UTC)

Nah, get him out of here. Bloody Aussie. Yeah, thats what Uncyclopedia needs, more beer-swillin', khaki-clad sons of convicts. Even the bloody dogs are poisonous over there.... ;) -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Nice one, you gay, bad-toothed, tea-breaking, tabloid reading, trashy food eating pommy! Now go and watch "Little Britain". ;) -- The Colonel (talk) 09:43, 20 September 2006 (UTC)

I, too don't want you gone. What would Benson think that you wanted to leave and never participate in his awsome articles here? Face the front true believer, and don't let the fake BENSONS get to you! If you go, I will write articles in your honor and for Benson's honor as well to pick up the slack. --2nd_Lt Orion Blastar (talk) 01:56, 21 September 2006 (UTC)

There are 2 things I would like to point out here:
  1. I never liked that whole "Benson" thing. It was both pointless and retarded, and it gave unnecessary attention to a moron that contributed absolutely nothing to this wiki. He wanted to be God, so I just paid my portion of tribute by taking my role as the Devil. An article on Benson? Fine! Go ahead and make it. I have no right to stop you from doing anything here, but who is going to read about a non-noteworthy ex-vandal anyway except those who have already known abot him? Besides, any material as regards Benson will serve no purpose other than immortalising him. If you want to do something in my honour, then send Benson down the memory hole where he belongs.
  2. Fix your sig. The proper way of doing signature is to put "{{SUBST:nosubst|User:your_username/sig}}" in the "Nickname" field of your Preferences page. In that way, the 20 miles of script from your sig page will no longer spill everywhere. Long signature codes tend to mess up talk pages and they get messed up pretty easily too if people are not careful enough with them.
--The Colonel (talk) 02:38, 24 September 2006 (UTC)
I'll beee baaaaack... maybe.

You'll be back, though, right? It won't be like back when my parents sent Ruffles out to live on a farm with all of the other old dogs, I hope.--Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 11:25, 23 September 2006 (UTC)

Seriously, I don't know, and I am not going to make any promise as to whether or when I'll be here again. Maybe I'll just walk away like your old dog Ruffles, or maybe I'll be back just like Arnold Schwarzenegger on a shooting spree. Anyhow, I quite sure you will do fine even without me around. ;) -- The Colonel (talk) 02:38, 24 September 2006 (UTC)