User talk:Guildensternenstein

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Interview with a Metalhead[edit]

I still have it in my userspace with nothing but a WIP on it, and I'll gladly work on it with you :) FreddCan Shredd 09:48 • Wednesday, 20-01-2010

Sure thing, sounds good to me. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:53, January 20, 2010 (UTC)

Raped Bitchez[edit]

I win. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 11:58,20January,2010

UnSignpost 21th January 2009[edit]

Also, it's MrN9000's mum's 60th birthday! 9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 17:33, Jan 21

Manual hand-typed thanks (to show sincerity)[edit]

I know this is a bit late but thanks for voting for my article and helping me with it. It wouldn't have taken the direction that it had if it weren't for your pee. Unfortunately, you don't get a template. User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 16:48, Jan 24, 2010

Thanks, I'm glad I was a help. And I suppose I can forgive the lack of a thank-you template, but just this one time. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:39, January 25, 2010 (UTC)

You still alive?[edit]

Work work work! FreddCan Shredd 23:53 • Sunday, 24-01-2010

Yes, I'm still alive. And yes, I've started working. Not too much progress yet, but it's a start. It's going to be a while, though: I'm, like, mad busy, so yeah. Also, I'm nearly done with an article on Opeth I've saved on a word document, so I might want to just get that out of the way first. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:41, January 25, 2010 (UTC)

Favre Fnord[edit]

Thanks for the vote on the unexpected nom. When you said "only questin is whether he'll be back next year" did you mean in relation to the article saying "former Viking's quarterback"? If so I'll change that part, if it's confusing to some people. It was meant to mean that he's dead, so he's the former. You know what, I'm gonna change it anyway, it could confuse. Thanks for providing the couch for my session, bill me the standard fee. Aleister in Chains 00:38 27 Jan. MMX

That's a good point, maybe I'll try and work it in. The word "former" as the first word in the article really didn't work, so I took it out, and even if you didn't mean to make that point that's how my laser-like pointed-in-the-wrong-direction mind took it, so actually, thanks again! Aleister in Chains 11:08 27 Jan. MMX
OK, done, second to last sentence. Thanks for the suggestion. Al 12:35 Same Day, MMX
Heh, well, you're welcome I suppose. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:39, January 27, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 28th January 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 14:52, Jan 28

So I watched your video[edit]

And at the start I was like, oh god. Guildy is calling someone out on the internet. About his behaviour on a humour wiki. But then, you started singing pop music to the whole world. And I laughed. IronLung 20:50, January 29, 2010 (UTC)

I was more like - "Beard at 17 (?) ? What were you thinking! But then you started singing to the world and I chocked. ~ 20:58, January 29, 2010 (UTC)
I got all the way up to the part where the video started (then I got bored and switched to videos of kittens falling asleep). If memory serves Guildy's vid had some dork in a closet. If that isn't the film equivalent of a Freudian slip, I don't know what is. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 21:08, January 29, 2010 (UTC)
Yeah, so I'll probably wind up deleting that at some point. Yeah.... —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:37, January 29, 2010 (UTC)

Ehy Sexy[edit]

Girl Scout.jpg Thanks

luv u

Thanks for the vote. --Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 20:05,31January,2010


Thanks for all the awesome things you did for us last year. MrN Icons-flag-gb.png 09:31, Feb 1

Thank you for the kind words, I appreciate them. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:59, February 1, 2010 (UTC)

Thank you!![edit]

Hey, I appreciate you coming out in support of me. I hope you take it next year!! talk 19:53, February 1, 2010 (UTC)

Heh, why thanks, Hype. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 06:49, February 2, 2010 (UTC)


On the Honorable Mention in the Top 10. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 20:23,1February,2010

Why thank you. Congrats on your eventual finishing in the Top 10. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 06:50, February 2, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 15:11, Feb 4

Just about this...[edit]

I like this article - not as a featureable thingy but just as I found the whole stealing intellectual copyright from a parody source a ludicrous concept, and I used the self reference as I felt the humour would be more effective if I used a parody of a recognisable thing as one of the elements. The assumption here is that people who are reading an article on Uncyclopedia would find the parody of Uncyclopedia more approachable than a parody of College humour or Mad TV, to site the two real life examples that I've used. Is there anything that you feel could be added to this in order to improve it? (Other than more Guildensternenstein references of course.) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                 

Well, more Rosenkrantinpants references aside, your article is fine how it is, beyond the inherent problem of the fact that it's very self-referential and therefore probably not right for the front page. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:35, February 6, 2010 (UTC)

And another thing...[edit]

I've been trying to work out my points on DU and I think I must have stuffed up somewhere along the line. I've just gone through and come up with the following:-

Article Points

Total 60

Does that look right to you? PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                 

A scoring system?? What's all this about? talk 23:08, February 5, 2010 (UTC)
This would be about this. And yeah, Puppy, that looks about right. If you feel like "officially" joining, add stuff in the appropriate places, slap a template on your userspace and give up just a little bit of your pride. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:33, February 6, 2010 (UTC)
I am officially joined, just been too lazy to work out points. Oh - I'm trying to think of a way to clean up the format of the scoring thing as well, as - looking at mine - it can be a little messy, and not very DU looking. <span class="GenOberst"> PoopyOnTheRadio </span>

manning can suck one[edit]


sorry for your loss

HA. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 03:35,8February,2010

Bullshit. They'll be back next year. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 05:31, February 8, 2010 (UTC)
And then they'll choke again. XD Necropaxx (T) {~} Monday, 15:00, Feb 8 2010
Hell no. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 06:19, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
You doubt me? There's an entire article on it. Necropaxx (T) {~} Tuesday, 08:05, Feb 9 2010
Yeah, which I wrote, and...damn. At least they wait until the playoffs to choke. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:02, February 9, 2010 (UTC)

Feature templates[edit]

Please don't subst or play with these templates in the future. You essentially messed up the whole feature for the day and caused the space odyssey article not to be presented on the main page. ~ 09:16, February 10, 2010 (UTC)

Oh, fuck, really? Sorry, I had no intention of doing that. The pictures were just screwy on my monitor, so I reverted to an earlier edit, not thinking of what that might do. I'm really sorry for any inconvenience, Mordillo. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:41, February 10, 2010 (UTC)
That's OK, I was already with my ban hammer in the air thinking it's some bloody IP :) ~ 13:45, February 10, 2010 (UTC)
Yikes. Glad I escaped when I did. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:47, February 10, 2010 (UTC)
Dammit, no! Hit him, Mordillo, hit him!! Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 13:52,10February,2010

UnSignpost 11th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 12:59, Feb 11

Opeth Article[edit]

Well done! I really like the select edits you've made. This article will probably appeal more to regular folks now and is even funnier to Opeth fans. There's one place that could use a comma; "but with Isberg’s eventual departure the project was left " I feel as if you could add a comma between 'departure' and 'the' That's pretty much the only thing left I have to say critically, very nice edits. (--Sir Skinfan13 Talk {< CUN RotM FBotM VFH ΥΣΣ Maj. SK >} 17:28 EST 12 Feb, 2010

Hah, brilliant, I'll nom it soon. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 01:13, February 13, 2010 (UTC)

Charlie D[edit]

It is now Charles DeGaulle as requested. maybe I should just put the original DeGaulle article up for deletion, I didn't understand it anyway. --Sog1970 22:58, February 12, 2010 (UTC)

Brilliant. And you've got my For, as promised. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 01:13, February 13, 2010 (UTC)


X Microsoft Knowledge Base Error
Democratic processing error

It appears that there has been a drastic mistake with the talling of votes with the Uncyclopedia 2009 Top 10. Please check the number of votes given to Microsoft Knowledge Base as it can't possibly have gotten as high as it has.

If the tally still appears to be correct, please restart the internet.


<span class="GenOberst"> PoopyOnTheRadio </span> 09:10, 15/02/2010

Der Unwehr[edit]

The staff at Unsignpost have come to the realisation that you have recently had to defend yourself from a potential usurper who has dramatically upset your rightful place as unfuhrer by out scoring you. While we are known for our gutter journalism and our ability to create complete stories out of minimal factual information, we would like to get a comment from yourself that we can twist dramatically out of context and show you in the least flattering light. Any comment? <span class="GenOberst"> PoopyOnTheRadio </span> 09:22, 15/02/2010

My official position is: "This is unacceptable, and will not be tolerated. Following standard Nazi protocol, the young officer in question will be forced to resign his position due to his disturbing excess of competence, just like what Hitler did to Rundstedt, List, Manstein, Bock, Rundstedt again, Busch, Leeb, and Rundstedt a third time. I wash my hands of this." —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:53, February 15, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 18th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 23:34, Feb 18

UnSignpost 25th February 2010 (It's not late your mum is)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 20:49, Feb 28

Can words speak louder than actions?[edit]

Just wanted to let you know that I had already decided last month to nom and vote for Puppy for UotM for this month. I'd really like to see both of you get it. You both deserved it longer than I have, so it's really rather unfair that I got it first. But then awards, like life, often aren't fair. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  04:55, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

Oh, well, by all means, go right ahead. And don't deprecate yourself--you deserve that award. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 05:48, March 1, 2010 (UTC)
Honestly, I'm not trying to deprecate myself. I didn't give the award back, after all.  :-D But I did feel a little guilty because I won it for a month where I contributed less than I did in other months. I just honestly believe the two of you deserved it longer than I have because you've been making fine contributions in various areas, and doing it longer. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  20:08, March 1, 2010 (UTC)
Ah, well thank you. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 20:09, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

Proggy beyond belief[edit]

My pretentious extended schooling after the fact. I'm stoned, so ignore me. New live boot became available.--DRStrangesig5.png Sherman.png Fingertalk.png  02:22, March 3, 2010 (UTC)

Holy Progginess, Batman! (I'm still not a Yes fan, though.) —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:56, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
Wow, I was really wasted when I posted this. I totally forgot doing it ;-) --DRStrangesig5.png Sherman.png Fingertalk.png  13:58, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
Hah, I know what that's like. Posting '70s Prog videos to people's talk pages, I mean. Do it all the time. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:11, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
Wow, way to use the Batman line immediately after I do Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 14:14,3March,2010
Batman was just in the air, I guess. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:25, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
BATMAN: Current project of IC. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:29, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
Heh. Well there ya go. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 23:36, March 3, 2010 (UTC)
That still exists? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 00:06,4March,2010
You betcha. It's been commandeered and is now quite active. We just colonized Creationism, it just got Pee Reviewed so is in post-review edits. Now The Dark Knight Begins. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:10, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th March 2010 (your calendar is wrong)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 00:08, Mar 6

Upsilon Sigma Sigma[edit]

Hey Guildy, I'm just going around trying to drum up support for a new group I'm trying to get going. I've been sitting here, thinking to myself, "gee, Uncyclopedia has a lot of stuff, a legal department, a political party, and an assortment of other great things, but it doesn't have a fraternity." I also noticed that the top 50 wanted articles list hasn't changed in over a year. Soooooo, I was wondering if perhaps you'd like to join me and potentially others in the 1st Uncyclopedia fraternity, ΥΣΣ, Upsilon Sigma Sigma, a collaborative an independent organization with the aim of writing exclusively requested articles. Also, I just want to point out that this isn't meant to be a competition with Der Unwehr, but rather perhaps a sister project. I feel Der Unwehr is more of a rewritting project than a creation project, and I feel there's a need to create quality articles from the top 50 wanted list since most of those articles have been huffed. Anyways, pop on by the page, if it's something you're interested in, just let me know. --Sir Skinfan13 Talk {< CUN RotM FBotM VFH ΥΣΣ Maj. SK >} 16:54 9 Mar, 2010

USS v. DU!! Fight to the DEATH!!!! Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 22:46,9March,2010
Don't forget User:Isra1337/vital. Recently updated and lots of redlinks. This is not a rewrite thing, but it is one of the DU focuses. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 23:06, Mar 9 2010 UTC
Heh, sounds kinda cool. I'd be happy to give you my blessing and support etc., although I should point out that DU does do requested articles in addition to rewrites. No matter, though, I'd be glad to support you. After all, it's all about the spirit of wiki improvement. If there's anything you'd like me to do, you know where to find me. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:50, March 10, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 11th March 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 11:00, Mar 12

I wanna nom your article, as if you don't have enough features[edit]

That "overwritten trainwreck by Thomas Pynchon" thing. Is it ok? User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 11:04, Mar 14, 2010

Wow, I'm flattered. And yes, nom it, if you think it's good enough. :-) —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:25, March 14, 2010 (UTC)
Now go vote for yourself, you whore! User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 16:26, Mar 14, 2010
Argh, must... correct... spelling mistake... must...not...edit... other users' comments... User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 16:30, Mar 14, 2010
Wow, yeah, I'm "faltered." Though to be fair, that was firefox's fault. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:37, March 14, 2010 (UTC)
I like "Wow, I'm faltered" better. And also Guildy is dangerously over the quota for featured articles, and will have to take three months off (or sign my name to his work). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:20, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

ΥΣΣ March Collaboration[edit]

I know it's halfway through the month already, but I thought we would go ahead and kick off our collaborations with a top 50 that one of our members, Pelargonium, has already started working on. The collaboration homepage is here, and the article we're doing this month is Nintendo. hope you end up participating this month! --Sir Skinfan13 Talk {< CUN RotM FBotM VFH ΥΣΣ Maj. SK >} 12:28 EST 15 Mar, 2010

I probably won't end up contributing to this one, mostly because A) I hate Nintendo and B) I've got a lot of work this coming week. Sorry. (Perhaps in April, when I won't be as busy.) —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:37, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

Last-minute thank you[edit]

Also, for the record, it took me about twenty minutes to find this page because I couldn't spell your username.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 19:24, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

Hah, well thank you. Also, there's a link right there in my sig for easy access next time you get lost. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 20:12, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 18th March 2010 (on time as always)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 11:45, Mar 18

UnSignpost 25th March 2010 (hand delivered for added flavour)[edit]

--ChiefjusticeDS 22:31, March 25, 2010 (UTC)

Here are some things left over from the garage sale, please trade them up, and soon you will own the planet! Thank you for your vote-to-be, appreciated. Al de'chainy 00:25 29 3 mmx

Upsilon Sigma Sigma March Newsletter


March's collaboration on Nintendo, our first as a group went really well. You can drift on over to check it out in mainspace. Now onto frat business and stuff. First of all, we need to determine as a group a few things in terms of our monthly collaboration; will it really be a 'monthly' collab, or should we not stick to such a rigid timeframe? Secondly, we need to figure out how we're going to determine future collab projects. Currently we're voting on April's project, but we need to decide if we're going to vote at the end of each month for the following month's project, or if we're going to adopt a rolling queue like IC currently has. I'm leaning more towards the rolling queue idea, but I'd like to get a consensus on the subject. In order to vote on this, go here. I would like to take the time to point out that we are not IC; in fact we're kind of the opposite, whereas they take crap and turn it into slightly better crap, we create the crap that people want the most. Along these lines, any member of the frat is encouraged to contribute to each months collab, not matter how big or small. There aren't really any rules in terms of how we tackle these collabs, so the structure will kind of just spring up.

Ok, the second part of the frat of course is the individual creation of pages from the requested articles list. None of us, myself included, have called dibs on, started, or created any of these pages. I want to stress that this is just as an important part of our group as the monthly collaboration. I hope to make an individual article of my own in April from the list, and I encourage all of you to do the same.

Third, the lesser third pillar of our group, pee reviewing. I would just encourage you guys if you feel like it to go ahead and do an in-depth pee review or two in April.

Well, I think the start of Upsilon Sigma Sigma has gone rather well considering most groups don't get off the ground too well here, and it's all thanks to Aleister in Chains and Pelargonium, who both contributed to Nintendo. Without them, I feel the group wouldn't have gone very far, so please pop over to Frat Bro of the Month at some point and give them a shout out. Also, please feel free to browse the various sections of the group (I spent a bunch of time creating the frat page), and be sure to check the news tab from time to time, I'll be updating that regularly. I'm really looking forward to working with you all in the coming months in making some quality requested articles! --Sir Skinfan13 Talk {< CUN RotM FBotM VFH ΥΣΣ Maj. SK >} 22:12 EST 29 March, 2010

UnSignpost 1th April 2010 - Always on time[edit]

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Friday, 04:47, Apr 2 2010 UTC


SAFPAS.png For your vote in VFS

and as promised last time
You have been awarded a Certificate guaranteeing you safe passage whilst inside those areas of Uncyclopedia under Zionist domination.
Certificate also redeemable for one (1) free bagel at your nearest grocery - simply print out and present
to the shopkeeper to claim your free bagel with the filling of your choice.

Rabbi Techno

Could you do me two favors?[edit]

First, the full script of an average MTV Cribs episode - as a working template for my upcoming article MTV Castles: Elizabeth Bathory found this one by myself after a second though, I'd like you to find me another more authetic one.

Second, an extremely negative but professional and throughout film review - also as a working template for my other upcoming article UnMovie Reviews:Worst Movie Ever

I'd be very grateful if you would find me these two on the innernets. FreddCan Shredd 16:04 • Sunday, 4-04-2010

Lazy. I thought I raised you better. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 16:15,4April,2010
Hey, you go spice up the UoTM nom. And change it to my current username. Also, no, it's not laziness, it's inability-to-find-them-myself-ness. FreddCan Shredd 16:29 • Sunday, 4-04-2010
That's a no and a no. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 20:32,4April,2010
Fine. FreddCan Shredd 20:40 • Sunday, 4-04-2010
Sure, I can find all sorts of negative reviews for ya. I'll post the links on your talkpage. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 23:36, April 4, 2010 (UTC)

Decided to come back and so forth...[edit]

I see you mostly stick to different things in your writing than what I usually have in mind - but if you want to try out a different method some time, come over and have a ride at SoS. First time we talked about it, you disagreed on the usefulness of the idea (based on your feeling that the writer needs to do all the work and get all the credit) but I hold to my view that SoS is a great way to collaborate - especially when you don't need to collaborate on any one article, but need just to fit your article in the general idea, and there are many ways to do that. So, read the shit and I hope you decide to help out every once in a while. Although you are a feature engine on your own. -- Random Oranssiviiva.jpg Man 14:39, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

Glad you decided to come and stay. And I'll try and drop in on SoS every once in a while. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:09, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4/8/10 - Oh hi Signpost.[edit]

Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:09, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

WotM voting[edit]

It's not about you using half-fors, though I might warn you that an admin might disapprove of that. The thing is, you already voted for Nach earlier (about two votes higher than your current one), so you see somewhat of a weird situation has arisen. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 17:48, 10 April 2010

Really? Whoops. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 19:28, April 10, 2010 (UTC)
Thank you for your half vote, no matter what came afterwards. Maybe on your fourth vote on the page you can consider me again, but I then expect to lose your vote on the fifth tally, and am counting on the sixth as the "magic vote" that will put me over the top! Ah, but beware the seventh vote. I greatly fear the seventh vote! Al en chains 21:45 11 4 MMX
Well, my ineptitude and withdrawn support aside Al, you've got my support next month for sure, provided you don't win this month. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 23:13, April 11, 2010 (UTC)
I have looked at the entrails of a pigeon, and it has told me 'ware the seventh vote. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Sunday, 23:23, Apr 11 2010 UTC
In order for me to be able to count the votes by the end of the month - cam you make it absolutely unequivocally clear who did vote for? Will all the strikeouts it's still not clear. ~ 07:20, April 12, 2010 (UTC)
The prophet of Uncy has predicted this. You have voted, by my count, 6 times. Now Mordillo asks for the dreaded seventh vote. I greatly fear the seventh vote! Al trembling with dread 23:41 13 4 MMX

MTV Bathory[edit]

Is on VFH. SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 14:46, April 12, 2010 (UTC)

I noticed. I haven't had the time to read it just yet--I promise I will, though, so don't you worry. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:20, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
Mooshy's whoring to you? How dare he. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 00:27,13April,2010
Please register your name here. Thank you. SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 13:11, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
Even though your name is conspicuously absent from both here and here? Doubtful. I mean, my articles haven't got a chance in hell, but still. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:19, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
Ahem. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 23:03, Apr 13 2010 UTC
Guildy: Done. Puppy: You first. SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 23:19, April 13, 2010 (UTC)
Yippy, I just got paid and decided to come by this den of whores. Well Hello there! Don't mind if I do. How much? Well, yes, I can afford that. Upstairs? Why sure! Al with my pockets full and yes, I am glad to see you 23:27 13 4 mmx
Well, if you insist. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:29, April 14, 2010 (UTC)
Already voted Mooshy - your turn! PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 03:08, Apr 14 2010 UTC

UnSignpost 15/4/10 - Yet another on time delivery.[edit]

--ChiefjusticeDS 20:34, April 15, 2010 (UTC)


I may come back to you for another request at some point soon (see Tim Burton talk page discussion on pee review) but for now: I've been doing some edits on the Marilyn Monroe page, and came across and added the pic on the bottom. Can you help identify the other three? My guess is Lana Turner, Jean Harlow, and Carole Lombard, but may be wrong on all but Harlow. Thanks. And feel free to come and play on the page too, we should have a top-notch page on Monroe and what's there could be a backbone or two. Al sans chains 21:48 29 4

That's a nifty little photo there. Unfortunately, I'm no expert on fifties' starlets, so your guesses are as good as mine. Also, I've got one week and three final exams of school left, so perhaps after those I'll lend a hand (and start contributing more to the site in general again). —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:07, April 30, 2010 (UTC)

Tim Burton[edit]

Remember like 9 months ago when you were doing a shitload of directors, and I said you should do him, and you said no? Well, it's done. Just about. So there. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 22:02,29April,2010

I see that. And yes, well done, those that worked on it. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:05, April 30, 2010 (UTC)
Thank you. And I was thinking of making a director article myself (Stephen Chow) but I have no idea what to do for it. The only angle I can think to take is his terrible Chinese-English translations/subtitles, but that seems overdone already. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 02:29,30April,2010
Well, if that's the angle you've got, go with it, by all means. You never know what you're gonna get until you start writing, ya know? —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 03:57, April 30, 2010 (UTC)
Maybe. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 10:58,30April,2010
Exactly. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:56, April 30, 2010 (UTC)
I can't believe you watch Stephen Chow films. Maybe you can do the article in his style of humour, with or without bad translations. User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 09:36, May 1, 2010
Yes, I was thinking of that. His style of humor is a bit... something. Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgWould you like a cookie, sir? Thinmint.jpgThinmint.jpgThinmint.jpg 13:57,1May,2010
It really is... something, alright. User:Hiatus Hernia/sig214:56, May 1, 2010

UnSignpost 1 May[edit]

Brought to you by fucking magic. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 11:06, 1 May 2010

Mecca Vice will skip your home[edit]

"Much thanks for your help in making it better!"

--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png 07:09, May 3


StrikerGoreaward.jpg Striker2117 and
Al Gore
thank you for your vote!

Without you, their theorem
could not have been featured.

--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 00:11, May 4, 2010 (UTC)

Please move your PLS submission ASAP[edit]

PLS Submissions have to be in your user space. The primary purpose of this is to insure no one edits your article, which disqualifies it. For your sake, please move it now so it doesn't get disqualified. Thanks. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  05:39, May 14, 2010 (UTC)

Nevermind; it is in user space. Your title fooled me. I'm so easily fooled. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  05:45, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
Hah, apparently. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 12:48, May 14, 2010 (UTC)

Just out of curiosity[edit]

Which other illustrations by Gustave Doré for The Divine Comedy are you planning to use? Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 19:08, 16 May 2010

Which ones are Divine Comedy ones? And I don't really know, seeing as I didn't know I used any to begin with. (In any event, all the pictures seem to fit.) —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 03:02, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
Hmm, it seems I confused The Divine Comedy with Paradise Lost. Though I think pictures from both poems could fit into your article. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 17:54, 18 May 2010
Hah, yes, the makers of Fallout 3 made the same mistake you did: Kinda funny, actually. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 03:04, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
I was thinking about putting something forward for PLS, read this, and realised that I didn't have a chance, and gave up. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 03:17, May 19 2010 UTC
I was wondering where your half-dozen entries were this time around. Well, there's r,five other categories you could potentially enter, so don't let me spoil everything for you. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 12:42, May 19, 2010 (UTC)

Sir?!? Excuse me sir???[edit]

7079-main.jpg Are you enjoying the flight? Can I get you anything? Fluff your pillow? Cook your taco? Adjust your seating, airflow, overhead light or oxygen? Ok then, I salute you!  Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  12 Jun 2010 ~ 05:08 (UTC)

Hm, perhaps, but I have work five days this week, a bunch of fun friend stuff to do, and another article of my own in the works. Plus I might do a pee review, because I haven't in ages and feel bad. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 18:53, June 12, 2010 (UTC)
You're not living off the two bits you get paid from working here huh? Friends come between you and the internet...? Next thing you'll be telling me is that you're gonna continue to be AMAZING at other stuff too. Way to make my life suck even more. Thanks a lot. (Stop by next week & add a sentence or two if you can.)  Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  12 Jun 2010 ~ 20:54 (UTC)
That I may be able to do. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 18:46, June 13, 2010 (UTC)

Along the same lines as the above, pee review[edit]

Very good, both the six-line stanza idea and the additional stanzas about BP and the oil execs in general (along with their governmental cronies from various American administrations and Congresses, including the present ones) Bottom line (here's a bottom line: ______________), would you like to collab? You've started already, with the two stanzas. I'd still like to link each line with something here, as that way all the pages (mostly in UnNews right now) concerning the oil gusher would be linked. Would be very nice to work with you, and we can both come up with ideas and then work out what works best. Yes, the present ending is weak, as I did try to work in a ryme to the second to last line. Well let me know, and I will work on some other stanzas and links in the meantime. Thanks a billion (and F.U. C.K. BP--excuse my fu. ck. in.' language) Aleister 18:10 16 6 MMX

p.s. lol. Check out the bottom photo caption. An attempt to save the photo on the page (it seems at home there somehow).
p.s. I've put your two stanzas in, although I reversed them (you probably improve as you go, the second was better than the first) and changed a few words (I think I'll take out Pig, a little too direct and '70ish, unless you really love it!). Can I use them if you don't want to collab on this? And I promise I'll go along with the same theme and put a lot of time in to do it juuuuussssssttttt right (to give BP another nightmare, although be it this one on a clown site). Thanks again, Al 19:03 16 6 MMX
I'd actually really love to collab. I've never actually managed to successfully do so here (nothing ever got off the ground), but since we're already on the same page here I think it work work brilliantly. I get to work first thing tomorrow. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:02, June 17, 2010 (UTC)
I've done quite a bit more work. Edits to your stanzas, added a new stanza, and am looking at three more stanzas, for nine in total. One will summarize/comment upon the government, one on the public's response (or non-response i.e. kicking capitalism's behind) and some other aspect. The language flow I've carved this into (lots of double meanings and layers of symbolism--even the Sandra Bullock line and Meg Ryan's facelift are commentaries on the two-faced approach that corporations take to their public and private agendas) has its own logic too. Your idea to add stanzas was perfect. Aleister 2:34 17 6 MMX
p.s. I'd like to do the last stanza, a call for action, nonviolent but direct, aimed both at BP and the structure of environmental destruction (did you see Chicken, the frat collab for May?]], and final edit on the page (I guess I feel an ownership ego-thing here, but I want it to be perfect and you tossed in a second stage to the project), yet I know you will add further great value to the page. So, fun stuff!

Your version, extremely good writing and edits (neither of us would expect no less!). I'll work them in and around and keep most of it, yet would like to do the closing verse focused on nonviolent direct action. But not until the 'morrow, my mind reels with too much oil, and I am needed elsewhere! Thanks, nice work all around! Aleister 3:36 17 6 MMX

Excellent, I'm glad you approve. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:27, June 17, 2010 (UTC)
Damn, it's looking good. I spent an ungodly amount of time mixing the two versions, feeling my way into the many-level based language of much of it, keeping what I still liked and hopfully what you liked. Two more stanzas needed, the last one the call to action thing I have in spirit (I'll have to carve that well). Can you come up with one about pubic reaction or something that moves you for the second to last stanza, or do you want me to go ahead and play it out? Your Red Sea page has interested me but I haven't gotten around to reading it as yet, but will do so right now. And I'm not whoring my HowTo:Reinvent the wheel page either :) (seriously), just wondering if you've read it yet, and if not, please do and make a judgement either way or not at all. It's one of my faves, but wayyyyy at the bottom of the VFH page, hanging on by its nails just as it's gained new life in the last few days. As for the oil poem, I kept the other animals in there too, and Sandra and the bunch, just to expand it out and to add a bit more funny within the serious (and I like them too, like tadpoles you want to protect until the fish come along to eat them). Al 11:33 17 6 MMX
Hi. Left a few notes on your most recent draft. I guess this is the point where collabs breakdown unless someone does the final edits, which is one of my hats on this page. All strong writers love their own stuff, so we need a captain on each voyage. That's the joy or horror of collabs! On the page, I didn't see various ocean animals as being excluded by the title, it's a title refering to the birds and, as you point out which I didn't realize until you said it, the "well-oiled (corporate) birds". But many of the photos to come will be of sharks (must use sharks, another double meaning), dolphins, turtles, etc. who are right now being driven toward shore by the oil in numbers which are scaring marine biologists and everyone along the Florida and Alabama coast. Cuba will be hit soon too. The most horrible quick-time environmental tragedy since the U.S. prairies were quickly destroyed in the 19th century. Let's get rid of Sandra, Simon, and Meg, which I think is very funny and has the great double meaning of two faced individuals, but you dislike. I'll keep Bennie, as he is a mafia hit victim who was thrown into the gulf to sink in the oil (and I think funny to the people who will get it). Much more, but this is a very large note. Give me some time to work on the thing again, lots of work on it today. Thanks, Al 18:36 17 6 MMX

Call to action, although I have to eat first[edit]

How about this ending? It feels right, or close to it, and at least throws a pebble into the pond. Al 1:12 18 6 MMX:

Later the next day. I found maybe the "perfect" vid for the bottom of the page. Blessed Be.

Here's the latest last closing stanzas. Thoughts, fears, and recipes? When did you become a wizard? Al 4:22 19 6 MMX

Students, housewives, and old broken-down hippies,
Show your love for all nature,
Not hate of the spoilers,
Ask for world healing, bring drummers and shamans,
To a nonviolent stand:
United Nations.
"End Earth's destruction", our request to the leaders,
"Restore lands and waters",
With the help of the leakers.
So here, a rhymed call for humanity's quorum,
Now gather your friends
At the world's modern Forum!

I like it. Perhaps a little preachy, but that's unavoidable I suppose. A couple things, though: 1)put a "The" in front of "United Nations" to make the meter work better. 2) The rhymes in the first stanza are kind of, well, not really rhymes. I know it's hard to rhyme something with "nation," so I suppose that second time can stand, but the first three lines should really be reworked.

Also, sorry I haven't been around much the last day or so. Yesterday I had a full day of work followed by a full night of friends, and now that I'm back home I have to shortly get ready for another full day of work. I'd help you rework those two stanzas of yours, but I'm not going to be around this weekend much to do so, plus you said you wanted to see to them anyway. But yeah, aside from my two criticisms they're good, so I guess so to that I guess. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:21, June 19, 2010 (UTC)