User talk:Todd Lyons/archive09

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The Great Aspie War of Ought Six

Please dive right in! As soon as it's goodly enough, we'll move it to the main space.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN  Eh?  Oh!  UnTunes! Cannabagreen.jpgI Card-spades-up.gif my cat! 12:34, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks for the invite, though you've probably noticed I had to decline.  :) I'm glad to see that your article took off with some great collaboration, because I really didn't think it would have been right for me to add even a word to it. My avoidance of the forum topic (other than my brief "prepared statement") is for the same reason. I created an article, I released it, it's up to everyone else to evaluate it.
I still like my idea and am not the least bit swayed by naysayers telling me it's 'not funny enough', it's 'too offensive', or it should have been written to play upon only straight truth. Should have?
I made a deliberate effort to begin from another place and portray it as a real disorder in a completely misinformational way. In other words, I did what this site seeks to do, and what I've already done in dozens of other articles. This one was not intended to hurt feelings, or start a censorship war, or to unite and divide, or anything else that's occurred since I wrote it. As such, I feel disconnected from the fallout. I'm glad it's making people talk and think to the degree that it has, but it wasn't engineered with that intent. I write enough "deep" analytical material in my professional capacity. Here, I'm just trying to make people laugh a little, and at themselves most of all. ~ T. (talk) 03:43, 28 October 2006 (UTC)
The fact that it is causing people to think and talk distinguishes it as true art, IMHO. 99.9% of the articles here range from godawful to brilliant, but it's all fluff relative to the few that inspire the kind of reaction this has. Very few of us will ever write anything in the same league. Anyway, I certainly can't see the AS article being offensive, but funny is subjective, yes? Frankly, I don't think you should disqualify yourself from contributing to the "historical account," though, since the quality of your article is not an issue there. I don't think anybody could reasonably object to your account and/or opinions of Slashy's comments here on your talk page, f'rinstance.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN  Eh?  Oh!  UnTunes! Cannabagreen.jpgI Card-spades-up.gif my cat! 09:49, 28 October 2006 (UTC)
True, and I could say more to/about him, but that's what he wants, I think ("Don't Feed The Trolls"). And really, there's nothing more to say. I said it, and so did everyone else.  :)
As for your article, I really enjoyed reading it and I didn't think it lacked anything. Great collaborations usually don't.  :) Anything I could add in under the historical account would feel too much like personal vanity -- my involvement largely ended when this incident changed from a disagreement on my talk page to a full scale war in the Forum. As it is, your article talks about a war between a community and an "enemy" and that's the important element. ~ T. (talk) 11:59, 28 October 2006 (UTC)

Guns and butter

Hi. I was trying to create a redirect for the article Guns_versus_butter_model that was Guns_and_butter. I'm not sure what it was getting deleted. It shouldn't have been an unused redirect. Maybe I'm not sure what an unused redirect is. But if you could unblock my other IP address of 147.72.103.2, I would appreciate it. I'm sorry if I messed things up.

If you'll stick to working on articles, and not making redirects, I'll be happy to unblock you. ~ T. (talk) 02:01, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Mother Huffer

I can't go back to Wiki...I think I sort of ticked them off; anyway, it would be swell if you'd republish the entry and not huff it, as I'm probably going to mention it in another piece. Thanks, sd

Why'd you huff sisquistashell?

Why'd you huff it the last time? The world needs to know that sisquistashell = clock, and I figured that a simple redirect couldn't possibly do anything. Apparently I was wrong. The preceding unsigned comment was added by VideoCWK (talk • contribs)

Unneeded redirects are instantly deleteable by Uncyc's Deletion Policy. Also, as a subject it only generates a few unique hits on Google, and none on Wikipedia. ~ T. (talk) 11:26, 21 October 2006 (UTC)

cheetohs

I created the "cheetohs" page a few days ago, I was wondering why it was deleted. ~Kikuta_Tomasu

I could explain, but much of what I would tell you is already written elsewhere on the site. Please read HTBFANJS to get a good idea of what kind of articles we're looking for. ~ T. (talk) 11:19, 20 October 2006 (UTC)==The Great Aspie War of Ought Six==

Please dive right in! As soon as it's goodly enough, we'll move it to the main space.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN  Eh?  Oh!  UnTunes! Cannabagreen.jpgI Card-spades-up.gif my cat! 12:34, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks for the invite, though you've probably noticed I had to decline.  :) I'm glad to see that your article took off with some great collaboration, because I really didn't think it would have been right for me to add even a word to it. My avoidance of the forum topic (other than my brief "prepared statement") is for the same reason. I created an article, I released it, it's up to everyone else to evaluate it.
I still like my idea and am not the least bit swayed by naysayers telling me it's 'not funny enough', it's 'too offensive', or it should have been written to play upon only straight truth. Should have?
I made a deliberate effort to begin from another place and portray it as a real disorder in a completely misinformational way. In other words, I did what this site seeks to do, and what I've already done in dozens of other articles. This one was not intended to hurt feelings, or start a censorship war, or to unite and divide, or anything else that's occurred since I wrote it. As such, I feel disconnected from the fallout. I'm glad it's making people talk and think to the degree that it has, but it wasn't engineered with that intent. I write enough "deep" analytical material in my professional capacity. Here, I'm just trying to make people laugh a little, and at themselves most of all. ~ T. (talk) 03:43, 28 October 2006 (UTC)
The fact that it is causing people to think and talk distinguishes it as true art, IMHO. 99.9% of the articles here range from godawful to brilliant, but it's all fluff relative to the few that inspire the kind of reaction this has. Very few of us will ever write anything in the same league. Anyway, I certainly can't see the AS article being offensive, but funny is subjective, yes? Frankly, I don't think you should disqualify yourself from contributing to the "historical account," though, since the quality of your article is not an issue there. I don't think anybody could reasonably object to your account and/or opinions of Slashy's comments here on your talk page, f'rinstance.  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN  Eh?  Oh!  UnTunes! Cannabagreen.jpgI Card-spades-up.gif my cat! 09:49, 28 October 2006 (UTC)
True, and I could say more to/about him, but that's what he wants, I think ("Don't Feed The Trolls"). And really, there's nothing more to say. I said it, and so did everyone else.  :)
As for your article, I really enjoyed reading it and I didn't think it lacked anything. Great collaborations usually don't.  :) Anything I could add in under the historical account would feel too much like personal vanity -- my involvement largely ended when this incident changed from a disagreement on my talk page to a full scale war in the Forum. As it is, your article talks about a war between a community and an "enemy" and that's the important element. ~ T. (talk) 11:59, 28 October 2006 (UTC)

Guns and butter

Hi. I was trying to create a redirect for the article Guns_versus_butter_model that was Guns_and_butter. I'm not sure what it was getting deleted. It shouldn't have been an unused redirect. Maybe I'm not sure what an unused redirect is. But if you could unblock my other IP address of 147.72.103.2, I would appreciate it. I'm sorry if I messed things up.

If you'll stick to working on articles, and not making redirects, I'll be happy to unblock you. ~ T. (talk) 02:01, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Mother Huffer

I can't go back to Wiki...I think I sort of ticked them off; anyway, it would be swell if you'd republish the entry and not huff it, as I'm probably going to mention it in another piece. Thanks, sd

Why'd you huff sisquistashell?

Why'd you huff it the last time? The world needs to know that sisquistashell = clock, and I figured that a simple redirect couldn't possibly do anything. Apparently I was wrong. The preceding unsigned comment was added by VideoCWK (talk • contribs)

Unneeded redirects are instantly deleteable by Uncyc's Deletion Policy. Also, as a subject it only generates a few unique hits on Google, and none on Wikipedia. ~ T. (talk) 11:26, 21 October 2006 (UTC)

cheetohs

I created the "cheetohs" page a few days ago, I was wondering why it was deleted. ~Kikuta_Tomasu

I could explain, but much of what I would tell you is already written elsewhere on the site. Please read HTBFANJS to get a good idea of what kind of articles we're looking for. ~ T. (talk) 11:19, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

Empty Threats

The preceding unasked for gibberish was spewed forth in an effervescent pool of filth by none other than 72.232.89.58 (talk • contribs)

We\\\\\\\'ll see how empty my threats are, Mr.Lyons. And the only reason I\\\\\\\'m using proxies is to be heard as you banned my root IP (which has been wrongly labelled a proxy as well!). Ever heard of freedom of speech? Obviously not - you coward! And if you want facts - Martin Bryant is an Aspie. Tell 35 familes he isn\\\\\\\'t violent and you\\\\\\\'ll get abused for a week! 72.232.89.58 07:55, 19 October 2006 (UTC)

As you seemingly have no limit of IPs, your continued anonymity is only due to your own cowardice. At any time you could choose to reveal yourself, but you continue to rant from behind your privacy fence. I\\\'m weighting your importance accordingly.
Your universalized generalization of one incident to paint an entire group as violent is simplistic, and frankly offensive. Your constant threats are inappropropriate. Overall, your conduct is an embarrassment to the group that you claim to represent. You\\\'ve made it clear that you are incapable of civil, rational discussion, and I see no point in conversing with you further. Feel free to continue in your repetitive drivel to anyone still awake. After all, the more times you say it, the truer it becomes. ~ T. (talk) 17:27, 19 October 2006 (UTC)
My continued anonymity is forced because you have banned my root IP - and for no other reason. That\\\'s not my fault, that\\\'s yours because it\\\'s YOU who is the coward! And the only reason you are calling my threats \\\"inappropriate\\\" is because you have no idea what you are dealing with - so you bail to the simplistic explanation out of sheer laziness. I am perfectly capable of rational discussion, but it\\\'s quite clear that you are not because all you want to do is have fun without being held to a count for it. Ain\\\'t going to happen! And the fact that you refuse to converse with me anymore only proves the point. Not to mention the fact that what I\\\'m saying IS true - therefore the more I say it (indeed) the truer it does become! This website (if I have anything to do with it) will not see in 2007. 58.171.82.174 10:14, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
2007? You're giving yourself a lot of time there pal. I mean, you could just blow up the servers tomorrow - (now don't get all excited, I'm only joking here...) but you're clearly going for the more subtle approach. Soon, a couple of full stops will go missing. Then some commas. After another day or two you'll get around to the words. And so, finally, by 2007, there's nothing let and we'll all wake up blinking in the sunlight going, "gee... that i.p. was serious". This is all true too, so tomorrow it will be even truer - you big scary hunk of a man, you... --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy (Bleat) 03:56, 21 October 2006 (UTC)
Guess it\\\'s a good job you don\\\'t have anything to do with it then isn\\\'t it you muppet.--The Right Honourable Maj Sir Elvis UmP KUN FIC MDA VFH Bur. CM and bars UGM [email protected] (Petition) 10:59, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
Oh that\\\'s a really intelligent insult, buddy. I \\\'\\\'\\\'WILL\\\'\\\'\\\' have something to do with it - so you are in for one heck of a shock. And well done, Mr.Lyons - you wrongly IDed another proxy when it wasn\\\'t! Do you REALLY want to know who I am or are we going to get all paranoid? 208.101.59.30 12:52, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
Look, in my un-caring, third-person perspective, you\'re all missing the main theme of this conversation, which is of course, unnecessary slash use and how it\'s affecting our children. Only together can we fight this growing problem. --Anyone 12:59, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
It\'s not the use of slashes per se but the wrong ones being use/////d :-), seriously though I wonder if we can sell tickets to watch the \"Raving nutter IP with his predictions of DOOM!!!!!\\///\\/\\//\\\" I\'m sure there is a market for it. (Lets start a book on when a vote to feature this thread kicks off)--The Right Honourable Maj Sir Elvis UmP KUN FIC MDA VFH Bur. CM and bars UGM [email protected] (Petition) 13:12, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
I\'ve seen this movie before. He\'s in the computer, get out of the office, Todd!--Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 14:28, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
So Mr. Anonymous Slashy learned how Tor works to use other people\'s IPs? Either that or he has a Botnet out there with trojans he used to infect other people\'s systems. I think we need to create an article on him, just to teach him a lesson. Mr. Anonymous Slashy and his unlimited army of IP addresses makes threats on Todd Lyons, because Mr. Lyons had enforced Uncyclopedia rules and laws on Mr. Anonymous Slashy. Oh the horror of an Admin actually doing his job and duty? It must be really tough for Mr. Anonymous Slashy to be forced to obey rules and laws, being that he is a sociopath and usually ignores them anyway. That does it Anonymous Slashy needs to be an article to be written and we need to include his posts in it and quote him. It is the only way to use his materials to make a funny article. --\'\'\'Lt.\'\'\' Orion Blastar (talk) 14:40, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
Hmmmm, his IP appears to be 68.207.147.61 And the WhoIS info for abuse is OrgTechEmail: [email protected] which any Admin can kindly email the logs of this Wiki to them. He appears to be from Herndon, VA or at least his IP is there. He looked to be vandalizing the Britney Spears article with vanity about someone named Derreck, clearly against the rules here. Also as another IP for the Asperger\'s Syndrome article. Todd, you can kindly email the abuse there and submit the logs and have his account disabled if this keeps up. I am sure they can trace the IP at the proxies he is using back to his original IP. You shouldn\'t have to have this happen, and I am sure that you took enough abuse by him already. I am sure that rr.com has a terms of service agreement that this member is violating. Email them the messages he wrote you here, I am sure they will be glad to help you with this matter. If that fails, I\'ll use my annoyance (it is a superpower) to write a funny article based on his writings and make him famous and be laughed at even if nobody knows his real name. It is the least I can do for my favorite Admin here. --\'\'\'Lt.\'\'\' Orion Blastar (talk) 19:26, 20 October 2006 (UTC)
He\'s your favourite Admin? Mhaille weeps.... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
He's my favorite too. I have a small shrine to him, next to my fridge, and every morning I light a candle. --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy (Bleat) 03:56, 21 October 2006 (UTC)
You are one of my favorites as well. Todd was the first one to promote me after I had a rough year. --Lt. Orion Blastar (talk) 02:19, 21 October 2006 (UTC)

I\'ll tell you what Mr. Anonymous, I\'ll go easy on you and I am sure that Mr. Lyons will go easy on you too, if you agree to apologize and read the rules and guidelines here and agree to follow them. I think you may be new here and might not understand our rules and guidelines. That could be part of the problem. You committed a bannable offense, but if you agree to work with us and read and follow the rules and guidelines, we can end these uncivil conversations and threats. Use the talk page next time you disagree with an article, etc. Blanking articles and writing protests in the article are not tolerated here. Nobody is trying to take away your freedom of speech, if you bothered to read the rules you\'d know if you wrote your protests in the talk page it wouldn\'t have been deleted and you wouldn\'t have been banned. What you did was Wiki vandalism and Wiki terrorism apparently. Uncyclopedia is a humor site, everything here is supposed to be funny, even Asperger\'s Syndrome. You might even find a way to add in your protests in a funny way under a critism section of the article. If you are too serious about that, and cannot be funny, then this is not the Wiki site for you. To help you, I\'ll post the Welcome template here:

Hello, Anonymous Slasher, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the \"sign\" button (Button sig.png) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, or ask at the Dump. Again, welcome! 

Read it and find out how you can be funny. Maybe we can work out these issues and you can become a contributing member of Uncyclopedia. The choice is yours. --Lt. Orion Blastar (talk) 21:11, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

My take on the above threats: the prospect of being blinded by 2007 is terrifying me. Seriously.--<<http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/f/f1/Bradmonogram.png>> 23:06, 20 October 2006 (UTC)

  • OK first off - I love the fact that everyone\'s trying to find me and got the COUNTRY wrong! That\'s hilarious! But I\'ll be serious here and make a point about the guidelines and so forth - in relation to the Aspergers article. You lot pride yourselves in being funny. The trouble is that in this world - there is a time to be funny and a time to be serious. Now with disablities like Aspergers - or any Autistic Spectrum Disorder for that matter - there is not enough understanding of the disability within the general community. It\'s not like blindness or deafness which is easy to see (pardon the pun) understand and so on. So it is feasible to make fun of it. However, when disabilities like Aspergers are much maligned (and I\'m talking about seriously) it makes the humour provided ill-timed and therefore EXTREMELY dangerous. For example - no doubt you lot found the Danish cartoons mocking Allah funny. Many Muslims did not. The extremists went off the deep end (they don\'t deserve any respect) but even moderates found it offensive. Again - it was down to the timing as well as the lack of understanding. Now mocking things that you don\'t understand is dangerous in the extreme. I used Martin Bryant as an example because he is apparently an Aspie - and the current thought pattern is that he was mocked and make fun of in a way like the article you have published. His response? Take it out on 35 innocent people with a shotgun. THAT is what articles like this can cause, and it infuriates me that people find humour in things that they don\'t understand and clearly have no sympathy for. I know Aspies who can\'t handle bullshit like this - and they could respond the same way after seeing this article. Quite innocently as well while trying to research something that they probably don\'t understand themselves. That\'s the danger here. Now speaking for myself I can laugh at ceraint aspects of AS - such as literal meanings (ie telling someone to \"hop to it\" - you know where I\'m going there!) but making fun of social mistakes made from a lack of social instinct is a bad thing. Aspies cope with destructive criticism (and mockery is destructive) very badly.
  • Now Mr.Lyons accused me of not being rational. Here I am being rational. I hope that everyone who reads this puts aside their funny bones for a minute and understand what I am saying. The bottom line is that Aspergers is a very new disability to the English medical world (16 years is a very short period of time) and now is not the time to make fun of it when people still don\'t understand it. I hope I have made myself clear on this, and why the article should in all decency be removed. You guys aren\'t Encyclopedia Dramatica after all - I\'ll give you that at least!
  • Oh, and on the slash thing - that wasn\'t what I typed. I tried to wikify (bold) the text and the slashes just appeared. Why I have no idea. I\'m going to be interested to see what happens with this posting with the apostrophes I\'ve put in. 64.74.153.230 00:33, 21 October 2006 (UTC)
Look here I suffer from several mental illnesses and I have been made fun of and I am disabled. I don't go around shooting people because someone made fun of my illness. I am one of the people that could have Aspergers because I have problems relating to people socially and my schzioaffective disorder could have been misdiagnosed. I find it offensive that your comments said that all mentally ill and all mentally disabled people are violent and have hair triggers and will go off and shoot 35 random people just because they got made fun of. You talk about freedom of speech, but when you blanked the article you took away the freedom of speech of those who worked hard on the article and the admins had to put it back in. Joking about my illness and disability helps me cope with it better. It is not my fault that you suffer from psychophobia and have a grudge against the mentally ill because of one bad example. Yes I traced that one IP to you, the edits match and slashes were used just like with all of your IPs. You are the only user here who has that problem, I can do a Whois of all your IPs, and the admins can send in abuse reports for every IP you use, and eventually every system you are using can have the Internet access disabled on them for ToS violations. The Columbine shooters where teased and called gays by a bunch of jocks and preps, so do we take away the articles making fun of homosexuals or ban the video games like Doom and Quake that they used which inspired them to work out a plan to shoot up their high school? Your current IP goes to Internap read the ToS many ISPs have such agreements. They have a log of your real IP if you are hiding behind one of their IPs. You are not as anonymous on the Internet as you think you are. By the way check out our Allah and Mohammed articles and see why there aren't any Radical Islamic Protestors burning Uncyclopedia flags. If you find the article unfunny or in bad taste, let me introduce you to a policy here. It is called Vote for Deletion. Vfd is the shortcut to the page. Just place the article's name and link in the Vfd page and a description as to why you think it should be deleted and add the tag:
{{VFD}}
to the page you added to the VFD page and other members can vote on if it should be deleted or kept. We are a Democracy here, and we vote on which pages get deleted. If you make a good reasonable and logical argument as to why it should be deleted, and enough members agree with you, then it will get deleted. Blanking, vandalizing, and giving Lip to the Admins about it when they call you on it are against our rules and laws here. Look, maybe you have a point, but you can follow our laws and rules here and still make your point. Post your arguments on the Aspie talk page, and if you feel like it add the article to VFD and explain why it should be deleted. Sound fair enough? --Lt. Orion Blastar (talk) 02:19, 21 October 2006 (UTC)

Holy Fecal E. Coli...

This isn't Todd Lyons from West Van, is it?--Maxmillian 19:30, 16 October 2006 (UTC)

I lived in Delta, Surrey, and finally Richmond between 1996 and 2000. Do we know each other?  :) ~ T. (talk) 19:35, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
I don't think so. I knew a Todd Lyons that lived in West Van for awhile - exact same name and spelling.--Maxmillian 19:48, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
Ahhhh... too bad.  :) I knew I was only one of a bunch of Todd Lyons's in North America, but I thought for sure I was the only one in/around the lower mainland. And for the benefit of others tuning in, I'm also not the practically middle-aged idiot that rides the BMX bike. I drive a Toyota Corolla, and (rarely) an 18 speed mountain bike, with all tires on the ground at all times. ~ T. (talk) 19:57, 16 October 2006 (UTC)

Nullarbor

OK, so you NRVed my Fremantle and Holden articles, fair enough, and I think they are fairly well complete now. But dude, have you ever been to the Nullarbor? There really is nothing there, and that is the whole point of the article. Kind of like this one, although obviously not as extreme. I dunno, seems like adding more words about a great big expanse of absolutely nothing would just be pointless drivel. Maybe what it really needs is less? (Edit: Or maybe it just needs to be more repetitive, kind of like driving across it?) --Bh (talk) 10:06, 16 October 2006 (UTC)

Fremantle and Holden look great now. Think of me as the grain of sand that irritates the oyster to make the pearl.  :)
There have been a lot of permutations of minimalist-type articles since Nihilism, and most have been killed off because they couldn't add anything new. Seeing as Uncyclopedia is a humourous encyclopedia (and allegedly a spoof of Wikipedia), why not consult a factual source to find material to obfuscate? Somehow, those idiots managed to find a lot to write about such a desolate place. P.S. A repetative approach might work so long as your article doesn't come off as a clone of Redundancy. ~ T. (talk) 11:21, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
Hahaha, a clone of redundancy, good one ;-) Anyway, I reckon I didn't need to use the GIMP after all. Thanks for your feedback and advice (again). You're right, there's plenty of material on that site on even the most inane topics ([1][2][3][4] and so on... Jesus Fucking Christ!) I'll think of you as that guy who points out the really obvious thing that I would have realised myself, if I hadn't have been too busy basking in my own smug sense of self-satisfaction ;-) Oh yeah and I made your Debian userbox into a template so that I could steal it's features ;-) --Bh (talk) 15:38, 16 October 2006 (UTC)

Your Opinion

Well Todd, since your recent Dr. Seuss article was so popular, I was wondering if you could take a look at The Putz Who Stole Hanukkah and tell me what you think...I'm probably gonna nom it any day now, I just want to know if you have any suggestions. This is my first attempt at "poetry"... You're one of the most esteemed writers on the site, and as such, I would appreciate your opinion. Thanks, -- Sir C America...Fuck Yeah!!!! Holla | CUN 23:40, 15 October 2006 (UTC)

I'll try to have a look at it tonight or tomorrow, and maybe make a few tweaks if that's alright (and if I'm struck with an idea). ~ T. (talk) 00:03, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
Alright sounds good. And feel free. -- Sir C America...Fuck Yeah!!!! Holla | CUN 00:08, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
To increase your chances of having it featured, I'd recommend you hold off nomming it for a bit longer. No matter what the quality is, I'd be willing to bet people would vote against it because Todd's page is already finished and featured. And then if it fails the first VFH test, you know people will knee-jerk vote against re-noms. Just my thoughts. —rc (t) 01:14, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
Point taken, especially with the re-nom part, but I dont think people will necessarily vote against just because another poem-type article was featured...I dont know. IMO its certainly feature quality, and I hope you agree. I still need more pics, so it'll probably be a little longer anyway... -- Sir C America...Fuck Yeah!!!! Holla | CUN 02:01, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
I think it's very well executed, as if you began with full, original text and began to replace elements. I wish it had diverted a bit further from the original story structure, but I can't say how I might have done it. It does need to follow a similar path, but I'd hoped for a few completely original detours (a double helping of cornbread, hold the seuss).
My only real hang-up with the story is the "Muslim as terrorist" angle. I like a bit of politics with my humour, but I think this stereotype has been overdone for some time now (here, and with the media in general). For me, I think it started losing humour at about the time that people were burning down North American mosques.  :P No matter. That's just a personal peeve of mine, and has no bearing on how other users will see it.
On the positive side again, it does end with the "terrorist" redeeming himself, and the bomb wasn't used (whew!). If you can wait until December, this might be ripe for publishing around the holidays like The Night After Christmas was last year (which is itself another example of how to re-write a traditional story from an entirely different angle). ~ T. (talk) 12:02, 16 October 2006 (UTC)
Thanks for the feeback. True, that has been overdonea little, but I think it works well in the story...Actually, if I try for a feature now, I have talked to a few people about doing a holiday reskin with my article, and your Night After Christmas one...I dunno we'll see. Thanks, -- Sir C America...Fuck Yeah!!!! Holla | CUN 02:28, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Miffy NRV

Hi Todd,

I am a bit confused as to the reasons for the NRV tag on Miffy... Maybe you are not familiar with this icon of Dutch indoctrination, only second after BB. Honestly, someone who listens to Van Halen's 1984 should first of all be a bit more au fait with Dutch culture, and second can hardly be deemed a proper judge of redeeming value.

Yours in jest,

Platypus Bill

From the first line, it sounded pretty random to me. How does a children's storybook character relate to "inventor of the tadpole and patron saint of frogs"? Uncyclopedia entries are usually their most humourous when they exaggerate or otherwise play upon an element of reality. Even with the references to other pop culture icons, it didn't really snag me. ~ T. (talk) 09:55, 15 October 2006 (UTC)

Nice award.

Have a cookie.

Newcookie.gif User:Crazyswordsman has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 19:39, 13 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks. I'm partial to the Least Awards award. It was my first.  :) ~ T. (talk) 19:51, 13 October 2006 (UTC)
Hah. I hope that means I some day become half as great as you. That will be unlikely to happen though. Crazyswordsman the Mediocre - (bite me/I'm not that bad) Click here for hot pr0n! BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU!! 01:07, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

Are my articles OK if they are marked as stubs?

Dude, you marked my Fremantle and Holden articles as NRV. Are they ok as stubs? I mean, at least I start my sentences with a capital letter and put the words in the right order ;-) I want to expand the articles some time but not sure if it will be in the 1 week given by the NRV. --Bh (talk) 16:04, 12 October 2006 (UTC)

Uncyc needs fewer stubs and more articles. If you need more time, I'll mark them as under construction, but I'd like to see them developed into full fledged pieces. You might also consider making yourself a sandbox under your userpage to develop articles on, rather than start partially-realized ideas in public namespace. ~ T. (talk) 17:14, 12 October 2006 (UTC)
Yeah, that's cool, although I do think keeping stubs for others to expand is a better way to go than just deleting them after 7 days. Anyway, the Holden one now has the UC removed. Still working on the Fremantle one. Oh yeah, to add the date after your sig at the end of posts, do you type it in manually or is there something I'm missing? --Bh (talk) 11:59, 14 October 2006 (UTC)
Were this Wikipedia, I would agree that stubs are useful. Fact is fact, and starting a stub there is likely to result in someone else taking over to flush out the topic. Not so here, so we have to push people to fully develop their ideas.  :) As for the date, I'm not sure why your sig file isn't working if you've set it up correctly. If you haven't already, go to your preferences page, and in the "nickname" box add {{nosubst|User:yourname/sig}}. Tick the "Raw signatures (without automatic link)" box, and you're done! Then, type 4-tildes ~~~~ or use the signature button (Button sig.png) to use your saved signature. The date should automatically be inserted after your sig. ~ T. (talk) 15:33, 14 October 2006 (UTC)
Yeah fair enough about the stubs, that was a bit of a RTFM wasn't it... Also my sig is working properly now, cheers for that. --Bh (talk) 02:00, 15 October 2006 (UTC)

Should this be in:

Template:Style_joke

I found it in the page on Bruckner and is is in several other pages. Tode 20:04, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

OK, I realised what was going on and reverted vandalism. (I forgot to log in first). It had been changed to something about "niggers" Tode 20:08, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

How about locking that page? Tode 20:10, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

As the founder member

You should add yourself to the Uncyclopedia:Welcoming_Committee list. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

I have a tendency to start things, then stand down and watch them go.  :) This initiative is no exception. Whether I do it because I like to always be creating the next big thing, or whether I'm just an inherently lazy bastard with the attention span of a gnat, is debatable. But one thing is certain: I don't want to lose any more favour of RC's than I already have.  :) ~ T. (talk) 13:21, 9 October 2006 (UTC)
Who is this RC of which you speak? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Why, Arsey Smurfy, of course.  :) And BTW, am I really the founder member? Someone else made the welcome template, and you're the one that started the group page. Sounds like your baby, not mine. ...Not that I'm necessarily denying paternity, but if you want blood samples you'll have to talk to my lawyer first. :) ~ T. (talk) 14:55, 9 October 2006 (UTC)
Heh, I think Mhaille has forsaken me since I removed his article from VFH. ;) —rc (t) 16:04, 9 October 2006 (UTC)
It would be nice if somehow, we could get the template authomatically tagged on every new active user's disscusion.---Asteroid B612B612.jpg (aka Rataube) - Ñ 01:32, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

I got demoted

I was playing along with this thread Forum:Getting news stories on front page? trying to be funny. Like many members do in a thread. Somehow I got Hinoa upset at me and I got demoted. What is a good way I can work my way back up the ranks? I feel like a yo-yo now. I've been contributing to articles, fixing formatting, adding to them, writing new ones, offering other members advice, and many other positive things since we last spoke. I guess I tried too hard to be funny on the forum and Hinoa saw it as biting the newbies. Ah well, I hope things are going better for you since we last spoke. I blew my rep in one night and got demoted. --Off Des Orion Blastar (talk) 06:10, 5 October 2006 (UTC)

Seems kind of harsh given your earlier track record, but I don't know the full situation. You might be able to appeal to him directly and get your rank restored. Nothing says that you won't get re-promoted by someone else after this incident has faded a bit more into memory.  :) Me, I'm fairly stressed at the moment, with most of my time focused on my university studies. I'm trying to make time to check in and do clean-up when possible, but it's doubtful I'll be writing any articles again for awhile. :) ~ T. (talk) 10:21, 9 October 2006 (UTC)
Well it is my first offense, if there is any offense as well. Hinoa did the same thing I did and fake Tourette's Syndrome like the n00b did. I mean I was not being serious and I think one needs to be serious in order to bite the n00b. I think in reality my response(s) were funnier than Hinoa's responses and it made him upset at me. I respect Hinoa because he was blocking some vandals and reverting pages and huffing articles that needed huffing. I wrote to you and not him, because I am more confortable with you and wanted an admin's view on things. I have my own stresses as well, my schizo-affective disorder creates stress from everyday things in my life. I am trying not to get overstressed over the demotion, and I am trying to be positive and still help people out ect. I was nominated for Uncyclopedia of the month, so maybe that will make up for the demotion? Like you said, after it blows over, someone (I wonder who) could restore the rank I lost. Anyway when I try to get over stress, I try to imagine myself in a peaceful place like a beach in Florida, California, or Thailand (my wife is from there and I visited there in 2000, nice place) and relaxing and soaking up the sunlight and swimming in the calm waters with no troubles in the world. My schizo-affective disorder causes dellusions, so sometimes I can really think I am at a place like that for real. :) I hope you find a way to relieve that stress, I had stress like that when I was at college and I recently graduated and walked last June 2006. I ended up with a left ventrical not getting enough oxygen and I needed an angiograham for my heart to check it out and clear out the blockages in my arteries. I try to write humor to combat the demons that I face on a daily basis and turn my negativity into laughter and I end up doing a bit of Ghostbusting and driving those demons away. Laughter is good medicine for stress and other negative things. --Off Des Orion Blastar (talk) 02:58, 10 October 2006 (UTC)
No, man, you've got it ALL wrong. Laughter is the WORST medicine you can have. Seriously, a cocktail of drugs and sitting at home staring morosely out of the window at the cruel, cruel world is the best medicine. Also, do you have any Leonard Cohen albums? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Well Anti-Psychotic drugs given to me by the doctor are all I take, none of that other stuff not even kittens. I listen to this music to help me cheer up. --Off Des Orion Blastar (talk) 12:13, 10 October 2006 (UTC)
Well, after having a day or so to look around the site, I'm wondering if part of Hinoa's irritation doesn't stem from your recent trend of advertising your articles on the DUMP by mentioning them in most of your posts.  :) What do you think? I feel like we have a pretty good relationship, so I wasn't bothered by it, but I can see it grating on others (and I read at least one message where a guy was made about you mentioning '911 sequel' too many times). Thoughts? ~ T. (talk) 17:30, 10 October 2006 (UTC)
Possible, however I was not aware of any rule or guideline that said one could not post their articles in the Dump over a certain number of times. I mean some people do it worse than me and even post them in their sigs and other clever ways and get away with it Scot-Free. I would think that Herr Hinoa would go after the signature sluts first rather than the article posters in the Forum. I'll try to cut down on posting references to my articles on the forum, unless they are related somehow to the topic or response to the thread. Deal? --Off Des Orion Blastar (talk) 18:41, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Thankz0rz

thanks for your faq <sig>Serminigo Whirling Star of Vigilance Captain Archibald Haddock and Assmonkey</sig> 15:56, 19 September 2006 (UTC)

No problem. I'm happy to know people actually find/use it.  :) ~ T. (talk) 12:54, 20 September 2006 (UTC)

Blog entry from the 14th

You know, I've tried the Office Beta, too, and it severely sucks. The interface is exceptionally cumbersome, ugly, and annoying. I don't think I'll ever want to deal with Vista, but I'll be forced to since most people are afraid of Linux.

The new interface may be a killer for Office, which has long stood as Microsoft's Killer App and has been the driving force behind keeping their OS on new PCs and the consumer demand of their OS.

I also got a deal on my new laptop - Just over $500 with shipping, came with XP Pro, and lots of goodies... I haven't changed the OS purely because I need to use Office, since people want DOC resumes, which OpenOffice often breaks. PDF is really my preference for resumes, but the almighty "Word format" is requested by default by the unwashed masses and some are so lame that they won't open anything else (nevermind macro virii)... I just like that not only are they portable, but OpenOffice makes really clean PDF files, and their native formats are just as consistent (but not widely used/accepted).

I hope you're doing well - I haven't heard from you for some time! http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/c/c5/Dawg.gif » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 20:17, 19 September 2006 (UTC)

(P.S. Ubuntu (I prefer Xubuntu, being a long-time fan of xfce) works almost perfectly on my laptop with no additional configuration (that is, insert the LiveCD and it boots without any configuration changes for basic use). That's impressive for a laptop, especially considering the nightmare that setting up Linux on a laptop has been in the past. It was faster than a Windows install in a VM (by a longshot) and it also worked flawlessly in there. I'm quite impressed by the Ubuntus, as well as impressed by the Ubuntu developer I met in Cambridge for dinner late on a Sunday night... If he's any indicator, these guys are bright and have a deep love for Linux.)
Heya.  :) My stress level is going down a bit, now that the family's settled in Ottawa, though I have several papers due next week.... urk.  :P I tried Kubuntu out on my laptop for a week and was mostly satisfied, but the sleep/hibernation functions didn't work as "perfectly" as SUSE does (at least on this Dell). Still, the 'Buntus are getting amazingly better with each release, so I'm looking forward to 6.10. I'll probably stick with SUSE though, as I've done a lot of tweaking to make it work perfectly for me... especially the Synaptics touchpad. Now, I guess I'd better start typing some assignments on it, and quit playing Mahjongg.  :) ~ T. (talk) 13:04, 20 September 2006 (UTC)
P.S. ~ Anyone thinking of running SUSE should also not use the Yast/Zen software install/remove/update functions and install the Smart Package Manager instead. What a difference. ~ T. (talk) 13:04, 20 September 2006 (UTC)

Thanks

Thanks for the kind words and all of that - I've been lurking uncyclopedia for awhile, and I'm pretty sure I understand the guidelines and what not. Still, it's rad you went through the trouble to give me those links. - Enzo Dragon 20:55, 18 September 2006 (UTC)

Current Album you're listening to

One of my all-time favourites, and possibly the first album I can remember hearing (at the age of about 3). "Death on Two Legs" is a killer, and a little part of me melts inside every time I listen to "Love of my Life". Not to mention the classic song. Hope you're doing well, buddy. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 22:43, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

Nope, you've got that ALL wrong. The best tracks on the album are "39", "You're My Best Friend" and "I'm In Love With My Car". Only three? I feel so old...... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Heh. You're both right. It's an incredible album; one of those that you can listen to all the way through without having to skip any tracks. If I have time, I should make a current list of my favourite "perfect" albums. (I wonder when that will be?) :) ~ T. (talk) 13:08, 20 September 2006 (UTC)