User talk:YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans

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Mermaid with dolphin.jpg
Welcome to the wondrous world of Uncyclopedia!

Hello, YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... Yes. You seem to have a sense of humor, but to be sure that it corresponds to the kind of humor that is accepted on this site, I suggest checking out the following links:

  • Beginner's Guide - A massive guide about how to be the best you can be at Uncyclopedia. I've honestly never read the whole thing in one sitting myself, but it is very useful if you're looking for help on a specific issue.
  • How to be funny and not just stupid - Our flagship link. This will tell you how to not get booed off the metaphorical stage that is Uncyclopedia. I STRONGLY suggest reading the entire thing through, perhaps more than once.
  • Our Vanity Policies - This page details why we don't care about your friends, your school, your gay fourth period math teacher, or the homework he has you do, and in-jokes. DO NOT violate these rules.
  • Uncyclopedia:Best of - For a bit of inspiration. These are our featured articles. This is the kind of stuff we like to read around here.

Now that that's out of the way, just continue reading and you'll notice some more links. These ones are about help in general:

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but I do recommend it, it can be quite enjoyable, and it's a good chance to let others take notice of your writing. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well.

If you want to write and don't know where to begin, consider contributing to Uncyclopedia's current colonization of the week, a group writing project to improve a single popular article. Anyone is welcome to contribute, so come help out! If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in!

If you need help, ask me on my talkpage, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talkpage. Additionally, the Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian, and remember: Have fun with it. We're all here to have a good time and a good laugh. Please sign your name on talkpages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button ( above the edit box. Again, welcome!

Sir Sockpuppet Of An Unregistered UserSexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg 06:51, 17 April 2009 (UTC)

Danke schön![edit]

Congrats for joining![edit]

I'm glad my advice actually did something. Welcome to the wet, wonderful world of Uncyclopedia! Necropaxx (T) {~} 16:37, Apr 20

I'm glad I joined, too. I mean, after the neutering, it was worth it. You know what the music means... Our time is up. 21:43, 20 April 2009 (UTC)

I nommed your article[edit]

Here's hoping people like it. Good luck! Necropaxx (T) {~} 16:03, Apr 21


...'re really good. Just saying. I've read some of your stuff, and I'm impressed because it's a FUCK of a lot better than mine (as well as most people's) early stuff is. Plus, you actually know who Anton Chekhov is, which is a lot more than can be said of most people. I also took the liberty of nominating you for N00b of the Month, if you don't mind. —Sir Guildensternenstein 19:17, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Thanks a bunch, you made my ego very happy! -- You know what the music means... Our time is up. 19:20, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
Oh, and in case you might be interested in helping, I'm thinking about re-starting an old rewrite of Groundhog Day I started as a wee little IP, so check that out!-- You know what the music means... Our time is up. 19:22, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Congrats on your feature![edit]

You're off to a good start. If you want, you can add this to your userpage:

If you want, you can food around on my lil' stub, Copyright Shotgun. Seems like your kind of humor! Saberwolf116 21:14, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Oi. Hey.[edit]

Hi there, just taking the time to introduce myself. I'm SysRq, one of the lazier douches on this site. I write articles, make snide comments on peoples' talk pages, and run a little thing called IC. Can't really think of anything witty to say right now, though, so just hang on a sec while I think of something. Also, cocks. (Welcome to Uncyc, you look like a very promising user.) Sir SysRq (talk) 23:19, 23 April 2009 (UTC)

You took the time to introduce yourself, but you neglect to mention you're a man of wealth and taste? :-P. -- You know what the music means... Our time is up. 00:49, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
Oh right. I am a man who enjoys...the finer things in life Sir SysRq (talk) 19:52, 24 April 2009 (UTC)


Hey Music, you are henceforth adopted by me. I can help you with any questions you may have; just leave me a message on my talk page. You're off to a great start (much better than mine). To graduate from adoption and become a "master user", I'd like to see you get another feature. You've got potential, and if there's anything I can do to help, I'm here for you.

Oh, and you can put this into your userspace:

Necropaxx (T) {~} 15:26, Apr 24


I'm glad you enjoyed Tradesmen --Nikau 04:42, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Thanks! I really did like it, can't wait to see more from you!-- You know what the music means... Our time is up. 12:11, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Please Go Here[edit]

And tell your friends--' Cheddar BBQ: The King of the Triangular Snackfoods 02:25, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

Red Lobster...[edit]

is awesome! I love it! With a little more content like you said, this is bound to be featured! Necropaxx (T) {~} 15:11, Apr 27


Firstly thanks for the vote, glad you liked it! And secondly you need to sort out your sig by keeping the code in a template. I took the code from the vote page and put it here. What you should do now is go to the my prefernces tab at the top and go to the signature box and paste in the following: {{subst:nosubst|User:YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans/sig}} and then check the "custom signature" box. This will stop masssive amounts of code being strewen all over the place, which can lead to confusion while edditing and also allows you to create more interesting sigs (should you wish to do so.). Afterwards just sign with of those things (~) as normal. And again, really apreciate the vote! ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 22:14 4 May 2009

Thanks for the suggestion, already clanged it. One quick question- how do I get the colors of my signature to remain constant and not just be the color of a normal link?--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 22:19, 4 May 2009 (UTC)
With code like this: [[User:Orian57|<font color = BlueViolet><u>~Orian57~</u></font>]] and then just change the colour and text as apropriate. Here's a useful list of colours. ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 22:24 4 May 2009
Thanks for all your help!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 22:35, 4 May 2009 (UTC)
That's no problem! Always happy to help my voters. ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 22:37 4 May 2009


Howtosandcastle.jpg "Joshy, what do you say to all the nice boys and girls...?"

Uh… Oh yeah thanks! Mrs Peterson said that I had to thank you all for voting on my story, even if you do all have stupid names. Daddy read it too and then he told me that he lied about the sharks as well as his hands being tied up! Mummy gave him a row though so it’s ok now. But now I want to know what the men and women who fight the boy-eating sharks do! Dandelion thinks they’re bankers.

glad you liked it! :D ~Orian57~ Icons-flag-gb.png ~Talk~ Gay sign.png 22:19 6 May 2009

You voted to me...[edit]

Before I had to whore my article. Wow. That's Impressive. Oh, and I like the color change for your sig.-- cHeDDaR,7May,2009

Thanks! I just happened to be at the right place at the right time. And Orian helped me with the colors, but I like the way they turned out too. While we are on the subject of self-promotion, check out Red Lobster. It needs a Pee Review, and its funny! Two for the price of one! It might be a little USA-centric, though.--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 01:27, 7 May 2009 (UTC)
I was planning on checking that out, but I've been busy, so I didn't want to make a promise and ward off other reviewers. I'll probably review it, unless someone beats me to it.-- cHeDDaR,7May,2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost is proud to present its 1st Anniversary Special[edit]

Hand-delivered by Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 20:15, 7 May 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost May 14th[edit]

Hand-delivered by Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 19:57, 15 May 2009 (UTC)


I reviewed your article, hope you find it useful. If you do, could I direct you here? :) Saberwolf116 02:14, 18 May 2009 (UTC)


Even though you're still working on Red Lobster, it's on VFH, and already has 10 votes. Guess you should've made it clear you didn't want it featured. =/ Saberwolf116 17:52, 19 May 2009 (UTC)

Really? Hmm. I had no idea. They should really tell me about these things. Anyway, I think it's pretty good as is, now that I tweaked a couple things per your review. I wouldn't say I'm unhappy about where it is now.--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 19:11, 19 May 2009 (UTC)

You're a Good Writer[edit]

Join my usergroup. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 22:12, 19 May 2009 (UTC)

Question: Red Lobster (currently on VFH) was a rewrite and on requested pages. So, do I get points for that, or what?--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 23:36, 19 May 2009 (UTC)

Congratulations, Grad![edit]

After getting two features pretty quickly, I have deemed that you are experienced enough to graduate! No longer a n00b, you are a full-fledged user! Here, take this:

Necropaxx (T) {~} 15:36, May 20

UnSignpost May 21st[edit]

Brought to you by Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 23:37, 21 May 2009 (UTC)

Hey Faggot![edit]

Or alternatively, hi there! I noticed your name was listed on IC. I also noticed that our latest project is in need of some help. So I put two and two together and realized I should ask Modus. When he told me to get bent, I immediately thought of you. I'm setting an arbitrary deadline for this one at next week Saturday, so if sometime in the next week you can tear yourself away from your porn collection and maybe contribute a line or two it'd be appreciated. We're counting on you, <insert name here>! -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN18:43, 23 May Dictated; not read.

Not whoring[edit]

I know you didn't want to be whored you, and I've tired my hardest not to, since you say you visit VFH often. But respectfully I am asking you to take a look at my article. I like you and don't want to whore to you, but this has been almost-featured for about a month now, and I really want to get in a few little boosts to get it up there. Mind checking it out? Don Puttano cHeDDs User talk:CheddarBBQ 02:58,28May,2009


Thanks for the support, it means a lot to me :) I'm glad to see that some people get it!--Sambuking 09:21, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost! May 28th, 2009[edit]

The only newspaper to be delivered by Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:14, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost June 4th, 2009[edit]

Delievered by Saberwolf116 03:03, 5 June 2009 (UTC)


Hey dude, just kinda need some insight as to what more you are going to do with A. As it is now I like it, but how far can we take the concept and what other things do you have planned?    Tagstit    talk    contribs    awards   04:33, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

I was thinking just a general sports biography theme, with the ridiculousness of the subject matter and bland tone providing most of the humor. As a "base article", I've been using Wikipedia's A-Rod page. I am planning to have him get on the Roman Alphabet after being traded by the Greek Alphabet for 3 first round draft picks, beating other contenders ¶, ℞, and whatever Prince used to be called. Also, the steroid part is going to be based on the difference between



, the former's crest being a sign of steroid use. Thanks for your interest!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 04:51, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Awesome! And thank you for your speedy response! I was thinking about going in and adding some things, but wanted to make sure I wouldn't be messing up your style.    Tagstit    talk    contribs    awards   05:16, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

An important announcement from your friends at IC.[edit]

Did you know *snicker*...Ahem. Did you know that SYSRQ IS TEH GHEYZORS? LOLOLOL!

Also, we've decided to keep our Colonization preojects contained to Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/project for your watchlisting convenience. Put it in your watchlist and try to remember to add a cuss word or something once in a while eh?

Also also, I heard that Gerry likes the smell of his own farts.

Have fun Colonizers and let's be careful out there. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN15:07, 6 Jun

Preemptive Thanks[edit]

UnSignpost June 11th/12th/whatever[edit]

I think I'm going crazy. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 15:41, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Much Appreciated[edit]


And in appreciation for your donation to
The Billy Graham Evangelistic Association
I am sending a sign of my personal love for you — your very own polyester prayer handkerchief, suitable for wiping the tears of joyous revelation.
~ B. G.

Thanks thank tank (again-again!)[edit]

Howtosandcastle.jpg "Joshy, what have I told you about manners?"

Sorry Mummy... I have to thank you all again because you voted my story THE BEST article of May and that means that someone who wanted to hire a space comedian will know that I'm funny and give me money so that I can buy toys!

   Orian57    Talk   Union pink.jpg 00:34 16 June 2009


Sorry about your article not doing so good. I honestly thought it deserved to be featured. Maybe my love of Fruitopia made me a bit biased or something. Don Puttano cHeDDs User talk:CheddarBBQ 17:31,19June,2009

UnSignpost! June 18th/19th![edit]

You'd think I'd learn that this isn't fun to do... Oh well. Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:31, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Moar Feature Thankies[edit]

Pencil2.jpg Writers, of all kinds, would like to thank you!

For voting for the article on Writing to become featured.

They wrote this template just for you, please apreciate the effort - it is a work of art after all!

   Orian57    Talk   Union pink.jpg 12:54 22 June 2009


hey music, i reviewed fruitopia, thanks for your patience! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 17:34, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

No problem! I'm working on some of the things you mentioned now. And by the way, HFCS is an abbreviation for High Fructose Corn Syrup.--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 17:43, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Morning Music[edit]

You had an expired WiP tag come up, so I moved the article in question to your userspace here. Have fun! --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 08:33, Jun 30

And another. --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 08:36, Jun 30

Unsignpost! June 25th or 30th[edit]

We're not late you're just high!    Orian57    Talk   Union pink.jpg 15:40 30 June 2009


SP-Orian57.jpg I, Orian57, extend my grattitude for (of?) your vote on WotM!

No but seriously, guys. Thanks, it means something to me, more than it should probably.

What's up?    Orian57    Talk   Union pink.jpg 12:14 1 July 2009

UnSignpost: July 2nd, 2009[edit]

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 19:53, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 9th July 2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 23:00, Jul 9

UnSignpost: July 16nd, 2009[edit]

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 22:22, 16 July 2009 (UTC)


ThinkerToilet.jpg The article Fruitopia has been reviewed by PuppyOnTheRadio(talk)
Version as at 23 July 2009 PEE review

And I also managed to make me this new template!

UnSignpost: July 23rd, 2009[edit]

This edition is on time, and anyone who tells you differently is lying! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 05:00, 25 July 2009 (UTC)

I've been wondering...[edit]

The name implies that you're a Dr. Katz fan. Does that mean I can expect you to write an article about him, then? Also, if you have a YouTube account, you may want to subscribe to his YouTube page. He rarely uploads anything, though, but his Happy Acres video always cracks me up. Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 19:58, 26 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, I love Dr. Katz. I've thought about writing a Dr. Katz article before, and sometime or another I might get around to it. I didn't know he had a youtube account, I'll be sure to check that out. Thanks for the info!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 20:20, 26 July 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: July 30th, 2009[edit]

It's on time, you were just high and didn't realize when it got here! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 03:30, 4 August 2009 (UTC)


Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 22:01, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost! August 6th, 2009!! WE BE LATE, Y'ALL!!![edit]

Hand delivered by Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 21:59, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 13th August 2009. It's not late. You are![edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 21:37, Aug 18

Thank you from the world of High Art[edit]

Post modern 2.jpg The Antipodean Gallery of Post-Modern Art

Thank you for your patronage.
Please, ensure you sign your cheques prior to leaving the Gallery.

Post modern 4.jpg
Professor Oliver N Acute-Tell,

curator of “The Antipodean Gallery of Post-Modern Art

UnSignpost 20th August, it's not late, your mom is![edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 11:32, Aug 24


Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:56, 24 August 2009 (UTC)

Oregon Trail[edit]

A belated token of gratitude. Thanks! Sir MacMania GUN[21:46 3 Sep 2009]


Always good to know my adopted noob thinks highly of me. :) Necropaxx (T) {~} 23:51, Sep 3

UnSignpost 4th September[edit]

-- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 16:53, September 4, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Randomber 30th[edit]

After some time, please think of the alongside drain cleaners! Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 17:58, 7 September 2009

Attention Colonizers![edit]

The brief era of peace we've been enjoying has once again been shattered by the IP horde. And since those pot smoking, tree hugging liberal faggots repealed the draft the IC forces are stuck with the likes of you. You are therefore ordered to report to the front lines at once for briefing. Once we have decided our plan of attack, we'll march into battle post haste. You're dismissed YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN20:31, 11 Sep

UnSignpost September 10/17[edit]

Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/17-09-09 This would've gotten here last week, but it's my firs week as paperboy and I got lost. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:14, September 23, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: September 24th, 2009[edit]

Hand delivered by Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 16:28, September 26, 2009 (UTC)

A word from your new insect computer WotM[edit]

Thanks for the vote! Sir MacMania GUN[23:04 1 Oct 2009]

Noob Tanks[edit]

Voting thanks.jpg Why do I need to provide this?
My Mommy says always say
Thank You
for voting for Why?
as Noob of the Month
for September 2009.

UnSignpost: October 1st, 2009[edit]

Late deliver courtesy of Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:28, October 5, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Sometime October 2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 02:03, Oct 16

MGMT Pee Review[edit]

I Pee Reviewed User:YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans/MGMT based on version 4163142 of 19.21, October 16, 2009. I hope this helps! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  05:54, October 17, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 22nd 23rd October 2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 18:44, Oct 23

UnSignpost 29-10-2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 01:58, Nov 3

Attn: Regarding an article hosted on your website[edit]

It's a bit late, but not as late as a late parrot. Thanks! Sir MacMania GUN[14:00 3 Nov 2009]


Okay, you mangy colonists.[edit]

I've been commissioned by Mooshy to rerererevitalize IC. I'm to be the glorious leader, etc. because Sissy, Gerry, and Opty have all fucked off. So, I have a few general ideas to start with on what to do. First of all, no fucking infighting. What's said by the authority figures goes. This is Imperial Colonization, not Imperial United States Congress. Second, there should be more of a limit on articles for nomination. Somewhere between 5 and 10. We'll never get to all 17 that are up there if people's votes are so scattered. Third, an active recruiting drive. It fits the name. We're going to draft Satirical Soldiers to deal with the bloody natives at those shit articles on IC. This said, I still want to hear all of your opinions on what to do. Either drop me a line on my talk page, or I'm on IRC damn near all day very weekday. So lets get going, Colonizers! Where the Wild Colins Are - LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! 16:43, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

Two things[edit]

First off, how are you? How's life? Does high school still stink? So long ago... those 3 months....


Also, are you counting Orion as a half-feature because of Sipi, or would you like to add yourself to the Hall of Shame? Necropaxx (T) {~} Thursday, 07:04, Nov 12 2009

Hey, you! I'm feeling freakin' fantastic, fair friend. In the "recent news" column, I recently acquired a 2nd typewriter from my grandmother, and as of late I have been doing most of my writing on them. That's probably the main reason I haven't been writing on here these days, anyway. As for the high school thing, well, I don't like AP Calculus. As long as we're having a reunion of sorts, how are you doing these days, anyway? [Cue "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant]
To tell you the truth, I never thought about the Orion thing. I think I wrote about 7/10 of it, so that would qualify me for the big leagues. Wooo!
It's been nice to hear from you, by the way, I'm thinking about finishing my article on MGMT after this weekend. Take a look at it if you care. Can't wait to hear back!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 01:08, November 13, 2009 (UTC)
Ah, AP Calculus. So many hours were devoted to you. True, you saved me a couple bucks, but not enough that I'll remember you fondly. I'll take a look at MGMT right after typing this. It's good to know my adoptee is still hanging around! Necropaxx (T) {~} Saturday, 03:48, Nov 14 2009
I read it, and I like what I see so far. I take it it's not finished. But if you keep up the writing, you got another winner! Necropaxx (T) {~} Saturday, 03:57, Nov 14 2009

Welcome to UnNews[edit]

I've moved your UnNews submission here because it's a bit of awful, and I don't see where you're going with it, so I didn't try to fix it up. I know you've been here for a bit, but here's your official Welcome to UnNews, complete with free advice and silly shit. Cheers! rev. zim_ulator (Talk - Edits Logs) I am the dirt under your rollers. 11:50, December 5, 2009 (UTC)

The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator, contemplating your fate.

Welcome to UnNews, YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir rev. zim_ulator (Talk - Edits Logs) I am the dirt under your rollers. 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)

FACT CHECK: Birthday Card not as Accurate as Hoped[edit]

I tried to be helpful here. Don't take anything I wrote to heart, it's meant to be helpful criticism, as best I can muster. Cheers! rev. zim_ulator (Talk - Edits Logs) I am the dirt under your rollers. 01:13, December 6, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Delivery! - December something![edit]

Late deliver courtesy of Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 00:02, December 30, 2009 (UTC)

I'm so old that......[edit]

Messyhouse7.jpg Thank You For Finally Taking Out The Trash
Unfortunately, the situation in the kitchen has not changed. I made it a point to not create a single dirty dish in this sink for the very purpose of demonstrating to you that the mess in the kitchen is not somehow our problem but is, in fact, your problem. Technically, that makes it my problem as well but said problem is one of inconvenience as opposed to the complete negligence inherent in your failure to clean up after yourself. It's also come to my attention that you and your friends have been urinating in the kitchen sink, despite the fact that it's full of dirty dishes. while your reluctance to touch the dishes is understandable it does not form a basis for me to empathize with you. While I shouldn't be bargaining with you again, I'll agree to clear a path to the bathroom sink so that everyone will have a place to urinate. All you need to do is simply dispose of the dirty dishes. We'll buy more at the flea market.

Every time I see your ID, the old disco song "I've got the music in me" pops into my head. I have no idea why. Probably old age and a penchant for bizarre associations.--DRStrangesig5.png Sherman.png Fingertalk.png  13:10, January 6, 2010 (UTC)

Your comment made me want to listen to that song. Upon listening, it's not bad, but I preferred Kiki Dee's work in the classic duet "Don't Go Breaking My Heart.--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 20:07, January 6, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost January several-days-agoth[edit]

I swore I'd never hand-deliver this again. Here it is. --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 10:07, Jan 18

UnSignpost 21th January 2009[edit]

Also, it's MrN9000's mum's 60th birthday! 9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 17:42, Jan 21

UnSignpost 28th January 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 15:02, Jan 28


Duty Calls! Imperial Colonization has been commandeered! With a shiny new, waterproof coat, we're heading out to sea once again. We need you for our next colonization. You have one week to nominate or vote from right now, Sunday the 31st of January 2010, to Saturday the 6th of February 2010. (See Protocol for how to nominate an article for Colonization. And remember, if you vote for an article that means you intend to help colonize it.) Then starting Sunday, 7 February 2010, we will start colonizing another savage land (i.e., improving whichever article gets the most votes). Come on board and vote or nom now, to the glory of Her Majesty!

EXTRA: Our most recent colonization, Transformers, has just been Pee Reviewed. If you're interested in making improvements, please check out the article and the review. With a little work, we may have another glorious Feature article! Wouldn't that be just spiffy? And remember, if you participate and this does get featured, you get one half feature credit!

For the Glory of Her Majesty and by Order of your Fearful Fearless Leader, Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:35, January 30, 2010 (UTC)

Thank you!![edit]

UnSignpost 4th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 15:21, Feb 4


The Bible says God created the world in six days by himself--our crew of talented colonizers can surely recreate an article in a week and a half! Remember, any Colonizer is welcome to work on our current project, which is the Creationism article. But before you begin, check "READ THIS FIRST" at the top. From Sunday, 7 February to Wednesday, 10 February 2010, a hearty crew of brave colonizers plotted a strong course for the article by consensus. We have the beginning of a great colonization, so go forth and colonize to the glory of Her Majesty!

Special Note for Lobsterbacks (i.e. those who signed up but haven't yet worked on a successful colonization). We plan to keep your name on the honored membership list if you make worthwhile contribution to the article or other parts of Imperial Colonization between 31 January 2010 and the end of this project. If your name is removed from the list, you are welcome to reapply when you plan to become active. Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  05:11, February 11, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 11th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 13:09, Feb 11

UnSignpost 18th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 23:44, Feb 18

UnSignpost 25th February 2010 (It's not late your mum is)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 21:04, Feb 28

Imperial Colonization: Creationism and Batman[edit]

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on my talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == Your comments == below my signature and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

The seventh day of Creationism[edit]

If you haven't heard the rumour, it's true. The new and improved and absolutely perfect version of Creationism has been created. And because it was so perfect, we got it Pee Reviewed so it could be even more perfect. Post-review edits are being done, and will be completed very soon so our colonized version can replace the current Creationism.

I gave credit on The Big Board to every colonizer who worked on the article (if I somehow missed you, put a note on my talk page). I really appreciate everyone's help; I think we have a great article. If this gets featured, however, I feel that only those who made the more substantial contributions should get co-feature credit. Otherwise, someone could add two words and get 1/2 credit for writing a feature article, which doesn't seem fair. (But note that half a dozen people or more could each get 1/2 credit; that's one of the advantages of being a colonizer as aren't limited by the laws of mathematics). Any opinions on this or anything in this notice are welcome on the IC talk page. Buccaneers traditionally work by group consensus, and I'm all for sharing the blame tradition.

I'm Batman[edit]

Our current colonization is Batman. Writing on it begins now. By consensus built over the past few days, this will feature a psychiatrist talking with Bruce Wayne, a delusional Arkham Asylum mental patient who thinks he is some hero named Batman--or is he delusional? See I'M BATMAN for the guidelines for this article.

Any colonizer is welcome to edit the article! Any non-colonizer who wants to apply is welcome to do so on the Imperial Colonization page. We promise we won't throw you to the sharks. Well, probably not.

The future[edit]

We are taking nominations and votes for our next project. As per previous IC discussions, old nominations which aren't in the lead and which haven't received any recent votes will be removed. Check out the current nominations before they fade into history--but an article removed from the list can certainly be renominated. Nominate and vote on the IC page.

Go forth and colonize! Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  03:36, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th March 2010 (your calendar is wrong)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 00:18, Mar 6

UnSignpost 11th March 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 11:10, Mar 12

Imperial Colonization Buccaneer Admiral walking the plank![edit]

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on the IC talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == (Your comments) == below my signature, or click the + tab up above, and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

Actually, I'm looking for a temporary assistant/permanent successor as head of Imperial Colonization. I got put in charge of IC because I kept bugging a certain admin. I'd say, "Why isn't somebody doing this with IC?" and "Why isn't somebody doing that with IC?" So that admin basically said "Why, you're somebody; go do it" (see discussion here). But as you can see, I took on the position planning to update IC, get it moving again, and see it through one colonization. Well, that happened. IC was updated and reactivated and, thanks to some great colonizers, Creationism was recreated in a spirit of cooperation, was rewritten on deadline, was Pee Reviewed and, as a bonus, was voter-chosen as a feature article within about a day of being nommed. Our current project, Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/Batman is scheduled to be written by 20 March, and then we'll begin another. IC is moving...and I'm looking for someone to keep it moving. If interested, please post a note on the IC talk page--experienced and successful users only need apply. Ability to say "ARRRRR" like a pirate is not required, but would be nice.

Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  16:38, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 18th March 2010 (on time as always)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png 11:55, Mar 18

Discordianism vote needed quickly and member retirement[edit]

VOTE DISCORDIAN NOW: We need your vote! On both Creationism and Batman, colonizers who participated came to a consensus on a direction for the article. But on Discordianism, there's been more discord--or at least not a consensus. So we're resorting to (sigh) democracy. Go to Uncyclopedia_talk:Imperial_Colonization/Discordianism#Article_ideas and cast your vote!

You can vote for one or two, comment on as many as you like, but vote quickly--this is an eleventh hour effort, and we will hopefully have a direction in a few hours. I'll be checking the results sometime around 03:00 UTC of 25 March 2010.

ARE YOU RETIRED?: Also note that colonizers who haven't participated in any of the last three colonizations will be moved to the retirement list. Quite frankly, I'm doing this primarily because I have to post each of these notices by hand (I don't have a bot, and sure could use one), and it takes a long time to post to the pages of people who are inactive in IC and even on Uncyclopedia. If you're put on the retirement list and want back on the active list, simply post a request on the IC talk page.

KEEP CHECKING THE IC TALK PAGE: Many important decisions and updates are made and/or described on the IC talk page that are never posted on user talk pages.

POST COMMENTS ON IC TALK. As usual, if you post them on your talk page, I'll likely never see them.

WHY'S REPLACEMENT NEED: A special added reminder that I, Why do I need to provide this? aka Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems) , am only interim director of IC and need a replacement. My intention was to lead IC just long enough to get it revived, which is a major part of the reason I took the title Buccaneer Admiral instead of Admiral of the Fleet, which is the official title of the head of Imperial Colonization. I plan to abandon ship retire shortly after midnight (UTC) on Saturday, 17 April 2010. I would really like someone to work with me on the current colonization, and I will be happy to assist whoever replaces me during the transition--I do not plan to leave IC, only retire as head. If you're interested, post a note at IC Admiral of the Fleet needed.

Happy colonizations! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  18:23, March 24, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 25th March 2010 (hand delivered for added flavour)[edit]

--ChiefjusticeDS 22:33, March 25, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 1th April 2010 - Always on time[edit]

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Friday, 04:48, Apr 2 2010 UTC

UnSignpost 4/8/10 - Oh hi Signpost.[edit]

Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:11, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 15/4/10 - Yet another on time delivery.[edit]

--ChiefjusticeDS 20:34, April 15, 2010 (UTC)

Vote now for Colonisation[edit]

Hello ladies, gentlemen, and other,

As you may be aware we have now reached the point where April's Colonisation, Discordianism, has been successfully moved to mainspace, and we are currently voting on our colonisation for May.

As I have been press-ganged encouraged strongly to take the reigns of IC, I'm sending this out to remind all current and previous members of IC to vote on next months colonisation. Voting is taking place here as we speak. As of 1st of May I will be announcing the page that will get our tender mercies, so I encourage you to vote - or nominate - now.

Good luck, and may the farce be with you!

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 03:35, Apr 27 2010 UTC

Discordianism has been added to VFH. Go, read, enjoy, vote. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 09:45, Apr 28 2010 UTC

UnSignpost 1 May[edit]

Brought to you by fucking magic. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 11:09, 1 May 2010