We Don't Like Fat People
“Fat people? Well, they're better than Jews… I guess.”
A song recorded by Children of Bodom, We Don't Like Fat People became the subject of riots in LA in the mid 1990's, due to its apparent "violent lyrics." Many (mostly large) people don't like the song. Alexei Laiho wrote it after he saw a fat person eat the last slice of cake at a party. The song was widely unknown during Children of Bodom's early years, due to the lack of spectators at the band's concerts.
- The name of the fatass (also referred to as "lardo") who ate the last slice of cake is Colin Peters. As an interesting side note, he was actually only mildly fat until eating the cake, but after its consumption, he was pushed into full fledged obesity.
- Contrary to popular belief, the other members of the alleged "Hate Crew" (Children of Bodom) actually don't mind fat people, but in fact have a disdain for midgets. (Even though their lead guitarist/frontman is a midget. . .)
- It took Texas milk farmer Ted Levine 7 years after the release of the single to realize he was one of the fat people Laiho wished dead.
- Many people feel that Laiho’s lyrics possessed a simpler, more honest view of the world than the violent, hell-bent lyrics of today. We Don't Like Fat People (not to mention the immensely popular We Have No Talent) is a good example of a man, trying to cope with the world's tough problems in the form of song (and, oddly enough, dance).
- Bill Jackson, a non-fictional, real person (I swear! I didn't make him up!) and founder of Catch Phrase Weekly recently named "obese" the word of the week shortly after reading this article. Sadly, he then decided to listen to the song at full volume, and died.
- In what is considered to be the 17th greatest irony of all time, all of Children of Bodom's members (with the exception of the thin one) are medically considered fat.
- Often used by staff members at Wendy's when its closing time.
- Lyrics were actually written by Seth Putnam, which is ironic since Seth is fat.
- If you play this song backwards, you can hear what sounds like Alexi and Roope engaging in oral sex with Alexi screaming "STICK IT IN THERE!", but towards the end, you hear "that was a good twinkie!" Damn hypocritical fatties. . .
- An alternate hip hop cover version of the song was recorded by Ronald McDonald called "We Like Fat People$." The song was labeled as Jay-Z minus the talent and featured lyrics such as "Selling the bad shit to get a good hit as I can get some bling and crystal meth up in this bitch." That line alone caused 0 Americans to change their diets and they labeled it as a cash tool to get more kids to want McDonald's (which worked).
- We don't like fat people,
- We wish they were dead.
- We don't like fatties,
- Wan't to shoot em' in da fucking head'.
- Pick up my gun,
- Shoot a fatty,
- Cut him up,
- Turn him into a paddy.
- So now you see,
- Our point of view.
- Next time you see a fatty,
- Give him the three*.
(* warning song is very chavy) (* Probably to be eaten by lions or the lions get eaten by the fat people)