Why?:The Making of an Admin
“A story of love, death and betrayal... no... wait”
The Making of an Admin tells of the creation and life of an Admin and also may serve to help those who wish to
ruin their life become an Admin. Our story begins with a small child who has just discovered drugs alcohol Uncyclopedia.
In the Beginning
Little Timothy sat there, staring at a world of
crap wonder, wide eyed, flabbergasted, bewildered. He had discovered... Uncyclopedia. Little did he know that this website would play a critical role in his life.
The Teenage Years
Slowly little Timmy grew up and became big Timmy. As he turned 15 he finally graduated from 5th grade. At around this time he took to writing UnBooks and is now accredited with the shortest book ever "Ways to Kill Chuck Norris". At school
his marks were dismal he put effort into all that he did, but he couldn't figure out how he wasn't topping the class, he knew he was right, I mean of course they were wrong about Adolph Hitler not owning a fast food franchise and obviously Robert Mugabe was a very, very good man. In spite of how much his teachers tried to brainwash him he knew that he had solid grounding in the words of Uncyclopedia. He got by in life for the following years, finally being kicked out leaving school at the age of 26.
All Slightly Grownup
As the years went on
the Uncyclopedians disease slowly took hold he became even more enlightened to the truths of life. At 45 he was living happily ambivolently with his mother, with acne and glasses. But he was forced to work hard writing articles, books and endless pages of news to show his devotion to this community that has given him so much. But at the age of 47 he grew tired of this and decide to do something about it, he wanted to do sod all and become Adolph hitler reborn become an Admin. One day his mother came home and heard talking in the attic Timmy's room. It was the voice of another man, overjoyed at the thought of him having a friend she ran up to Timmy's room and saw her worst fears (the details are too horrible to be described in this book). She ran down into the kitchen while yelling "Where did I go wrong!?" and Timmy did not even flinch when he heard the unmistakable sound of a steak knife penetrating flesh and the "shhhhhh" of arterial blood. His transformation into T1MM0 had begun.
The Final Stages of
Life Being Alive
After many months of, showing himself to to his heros, the Admins, they decided to give him a chance. He had to write an Unbook by the following morning, but due
to a horrible Hollywood timing clash he had a date with a Russian super model (ordered off e-bay of course) that night, there was no way he would have time for both. He had to decide between a life of sleeping with beautiful Russian super models and
a life of Uncyclopedia. The chocie was obvious. The title of the book he was putting his faith behind was "The Tractor Drivers of Slough"... Predictably, judging from the title, the book was a failure and he missed his chance at becoming an admin. He would never feel the joy of killing another mans dreams and calling him an idiot. Being a ###hole without consequence. He was doomed forever to be a n00b. He did the rational thing, and slit his neck. His life ending as it would for any others who fall into the net of Uncyclopedia, wait... no... shit... I've just written...