Word search

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A word search is a torture device invented by Satan for use on his subjects in Hell.

History of the Word Search[edit]

Satan invented the word search in the year 1702 B.C.E. after he realized Hell was not at all practical in its current state due to the gas bill. He wanted to find an efficient way to torture the damned, that would also be unhealthy. Faced with this dilemma, he called a meeting with all the Highest Demons of Hell. Allegedly, the brainstorming process took 27 years, because the screaming was a distraction. Eventually, one of the dimmest demons suggested math, but Satan rejected that idea, since it could stop the brains of the damned from becoming completely Atrophied. It did, however, give Satan the brilliant idea of using paperwork as torture. After 232232.54534 more nanoseconds of brainstorming, the design of the word find had been perfected. It was an almost perfect arrangement, because the used word finds could eventually be made into a large bonfire for the damned to be thrown into. However, Satan soon had to abandon this idea, when it became evident that certain people actually enjoyed this torture. However, the word search is considered his greatest achievement to this day. In 2000 Satan succeeded in selling his newest form of torture to Earthlings. Thus, the SUDOKU was born.

Design of a Word Search[edit]

A word search is a painful torture that consists of sadistically random letters arranged in a grid, that usually has the shape of a tessaract. The way to escape the torture (assumidly to receive even more) is to find and mark all of the misspelled words hidden in the grid. The words may have been placed horizontally, vertically or diagonally. They may have been written backwards. If so, the person who designed the word search is actually a demon controlling a human body, the soul that normally accompanies it being in the lake of Cocytus. A list of the hidden words is never provided, to make the torture worse. Many word search puzzles have a theme to which all the hidden words are totally unrelated.

Word searches are commonly found in torture chambers. Some teachers use them as disciplinary tools for children, the benefit being that they are more legal than paddling.

The puzzle grid may be represented instead as a string of characters in versions designed for text messaging to people you hate, on mobile devices, particularly cell phones. In this case, the object may be to only find one word or a few words hidden among the character string. The hidden word(s) may be presented backwards more frequently than in the traditional word search puzzle as it is impossible to arrange them diagonally or vertically. A clue to assist the player in finding the hidden word(s) will never be provided, for any reason.

Subliminal messages[edit]

Since the Word Search was first designed by Satan, sometimes secret messages are hidden in the word search. In one variation, the secret message is created by all the words that are written backwards in the grid. In another variation, the secret message is created by the letters that are not used in any word within the grid. Usually these messages are designed to convince whoever is looking at the word search to sin, because Satan always needs more losers to keep him company.